Using the Queen's Engerlish
So, here are some rules to keep in mind when using the Queen's Engerlish:
- Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
- And don't start a sentence with a conjunction.
- Avoid cliches like the plague. (They're old hat).
- Always avoid annoying alliteration.
- Be more or less specific.
- Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are (usually) unnecessary.
- Also, too, never, ever use repetitive redundancies.
- No sentence fragments. No comma splices, run-ons are bad too.
- Contractions aren't helpful and shouldn't be used.
- Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
- Do not be redundant; do not use more words than necessary; it's highly superfluous.
- One should never generalize.
- Don't use no double negatives.
- Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
- One-word sentences? Eliminate.
- Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
- Never use a big word when a diminutive one would suffice.
- Use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.
- Use the apostrophe in it's proper place and omit it when its not needed.
- If you've heard it once, you've heard it a thousand times: resist
hyperbole; not one writer in a million can use it correctly.
- Puns are for children, not groan readers.
- Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
- Who needs rhetorical questions?
- Exaggeration is a million times worse than understatement.
- Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.
From the book "Fumblerules" by William Safire
- Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
- And don't start a sentence with a conjunction.
- Avoid cliches like the plague. (They're old hat).
- Always avoid annoying alliteration.
- Be more or less specific.
- Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are (usually) unnecessary.
- Also, too, never, ever use repetitive redundancies.
- No sentence fragments. No comma splices, run-ons are bad too.
- Contractions aren't helpful and shouldn't be used.
- Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
- Do not be redundant; do not use more words than necessary; it's highly superfluous.
- One should never generalize.
- Don't use no double negatives.
- Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
- One-word sentences? Eliminate.
- Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
- Never use a big word when a diminutive one would suffice.
- Use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.
- Use the apostrophe in it's proper place and omit it when its not needed.
- If you've heard it once, you've heard it a thousand times: resist
hyperbole; not one writer in a million can use it correctly.
- Puns are for children, not groan readers.
- Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
- Who needs rhetorical questions?
- Exaggeration is a million times worse than understatement.
- Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.
From the book "Fumblerules" by William Safire
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