NY Puerto Rican recipes i need to cook.
Set 2 cups of water to boil
Dick around on reddit until the water is boiling
Throw in one cup of rice, turn the heat down to simmer and lid that shit
Slice up a small onion
Smash up a clove of garlic
Throw some olive oil or butter into a HOT pan.
Throw the onions and garlic into the pan and fry them till the onion gets glassy. Throw some salt in there.
Toss in half a packet of Sazon and stir till you get a paste. Now you have a ghetto sofrito.
Add your can of beans bean juice and all.
Add a pinch of Cayenne pepper
Your rice is done.
Throw the beans on top.
Buy yourself a nice meaty pork shoulder. 5 lbs should do nicely.
Bring that fucker home and get out a long, thin knife.
In a pilon (that's a mortar and pestle gringo) smash up a few cloves of Garlic, some sazon, some, salt, some pepper, and some oil. Grind it up GOOD. Now you have another ghetto sofrito.
Take your knife and stab some holes in the pig. Twist the knife around so the holes get nice and wide.
Now, take some of your sofrito and stuff it into the holes. Don't be shy blanco, ram it in there. Use the remainder to roughly coat the outside of the pig. RUB IT. CARESS IT. This pig died so that you may eat. Salt that shit all over the outside and crack some fucking pepper on there.
Set your oven for ~300 degrees
Throw the pork in skin side up and WAIT.
It's going to take like 45 minutes a pound...
A warning: The smell is going to drive you INSANE. You have to wait this part out. Farm work is the best cure.
After an an hour and a half, jab it with a meat thermometer, but remember to not rest it on the bone, or you will get a bad reading.
You should be at around 150-160 degrees. Now comes the fun part. CRANK the stove up to 400 degrees. This will give you an orgasmic, crispy skin that will make your pork rinds taste like year old carboard comparison.
At 170 ish? Pull that out, but DON'T carve it up. You need to wait at least ten minutes otherwise all those sweet, sweet pig juices will dribble the fuck out. WAIT.Congratulations. You just made Pernil. A five pound Pernil should give you meat for at least a week.