Amo Ergo Sum

BYU is willing to play on Sunday

2011-11-01T10:42:00.011-06:00

With the scheduling of the BYU-New Mexico State on Saturday, Nov. 19, at 8:15 PM Mountain Time BYU is conceding the fact they could possibly play on Sunday. How so? While the average NCAA college football game is between 3 hours and 3 hours and 15 minutes they routinely go well over that. BYU is opening itself up to a probability, I would guess less than 5%, that it will still be playing past midnight. Twice this season they've come close with a 3 hour 42 minute game against Utah and a 3 hour 34 minute game against TCU.

Here are some BYU games from the past 20 years that all would have broken the "sabbath" for BYU.

Date Opponent Time Result
11/28/09 vs. Utah 3:54 W, 26-23
9/15/07 vs. Tulsa 3:57 L, 47-55
9/24/05 vs. TCU 4:42 L, 50-51
10/22/05 vs. Notre Dame 3:46 L, 23-49
10/29/05 vs. Air Force 3:52 W, 62-41
11/5/05 vs. UNLV 3:50 W, 55-14
11/19/05 vs. Utah 4:15 L, 34-41
12/22/05 vs California 3:49 L, 28-35
9/6/02 vs. Hawaii 4:00 W, 35-32
12/8/01 at Hawaii 4:24 L, 45-72
10/8/94 at Fresno State 3:54 W, 32-30
11/20/93 vs. Utah 3:53 L, 31-34
9/4/93 at New Mexico 3:50 W, 34-31
10/30/93 at Utah State 3:50 L, 56-58
11/16/91 at San Diego State 3:54 T, 52-52

I wonder what the contingency is it the game approaches midnight? Forfeit? What about the employees at Lavell Edwards Stadium? I can't imagine that they'll be finished with all their work by midnight. Is this all just to make ESPN happy with their TV contract?

How to Watch ESPN3 on a iPhone or iPad

2011-09-06T14:55:00.004-06:00

Watching the streaming ESPN3 has been nearly impossible on a iPhone or iPad due to the fact that the site required Flash for the streaming video. There were a few app work arounds but they were never free or too complex. Lucky for me I found that ESPN now has a app that does just that.

It's the WatchESPN app now available for download at the app store here.

Right now it is only available if you use Bright House Networks, Time Warner Cable & Verizon FiOS TV. So Comcast, DishNetwork and DirectTV customers are excluded for now.

This includes:

Live streaming access to the top events from the ESPN family of networks, including:
* NBA Regular Season and Playoffs
* Major League Baseball
* The Masters, US Open and The Open Championships
* College Football and Basketball
* Barclay’s Premier League, Spanish Primera Division and Euro 2012 Soccer
* All 4 Grand Slam tennis events
…and thousands more live events airing on the ESPN networks

Up-to-the-minute news, highlights and analysis with live streaming access to your favorite ESPN shows, including:
* SportsCenter
* PTI
* Mike & Mike
* SportsNation
* Baseball Tonight
…and every other ESPN original show

You will need to verify access through your cable/satellite provider.

Rockstar Breakfast

2011-05-03T09:10:00.004-06:00

My old roommate recently became my temporary roommate again and it reminded me of the favorite breakfast he would make for my kids. He called it the Rockstar Breakfast. It's also known as a egg in the basket, toad in the hole, rocky mountain toast, or moon sandwich.

You shouldn't need a recipe because the picture explains it all.

Drunken Shrimp

2011-04-27T16:12:00.003-06:00

Drunken Shrimp are now on my soon to cook list.

Ingredients:

3 tablespoons olive oil

12 U10 shrimp, peeled with head on

1 tablespoon honey

2 tablespoons sake

1 tablespoon butter

4 cups baby spinach

2 tablespoons lemon juice

salt and freshly ground black pepper

Directions:

In a large bowl toss the shrimp and the olive oil and sprinkle with salt.
Heat a saute pan over high heat. Add the shrimp and saute for 2 minutes on each side. Transfer to a large bowl.
In the same pan, combine the honey, sake, and butter. Bring to a simmer and cook for 1 minute. Pour the mixture over the shrimp and toss with the baby spinach, lemon juice, and season to taste.

Recipe from The Food Republic

Soft Tip Out Chart

2011-04-18T17:03:00.005-06:00

There are a lot of out charts on the internet but few focus on the soft tip dart game. I created one using the unique aspect of the bull and soft tip scoring. One example is with numbers like 139-137 and 129-127 I prefer to shoot T19,18,17 where a single would leave 120/110 and a 2 dart out. I also would rather shoot T19 or T17 rather than T15 whenever possible because 15 is surrounded by even numbers and a miss might put you on a bogey for your remaining 2 darts.


.	180	T20 T20 T20	133	B T11 B	86	B D18
.	179	NONE	132	B B D16	85	T19 D14 or T15 D20
.	178	NONE	131	B T19 D12	84	B D17
.	177	T20 T20 T19	130	B B D15	83	B T11
.	176	NONE	129	T19 B D11	82	B D16
.	175	NONE	128	T18 B D12	81	T19 D12
.	174	T20 T19 T19	127	T17 B D13	80	B D15
.	173	NONE	126	B B D13	79	T19 D11
.	172	NONE	125	T15 B D15	78	T18 D12
.	171	T19 T19 T19	124	B B D12	77	T17 D13
.	170	T20 T20 B	123	B T19 D8	76	B D13 or D16 D14
.	169	NONE	122	B B D11	75	T19 18 or T15 D15
.	168	T19 T19 T18	121	B T17 D10	74	B D12
.	167	T20 T19 B	120	B 20 B	73	T19 D8
.	166	NONE	119	B 19 B	72	B D11
.	165	T19 T18 T18	118	B 18 B	71	20 T71
.	164	T20 T18 B	117	B 17 B	70	20 B
.	163	NONE	116	B 16 B	69	19 B


.	162	T18 T18 T18	115	B 15 B	68	18 B
.	161	T20 T17 B	114	B 14 B	67	17 B
.	160	B B T20	113	B 13 B	66	16 B
.	159	T19 T20 T14	112	B 12 B	65	15 B
.	158	B T20 T16	111	B 11 B	64	14 B
.	157	B B T19	110	B 10 B OR B T20	63	13 B
.	156	T20 T20 D18	109	B 9 B OR T19 20 D16	62	12 B
.	155	B T20 T15	108	B 8 B	61	11 B
.	154	B B T18	107	B 7 B OR B T19	60	T20
.	153	T19 T20 D18	106	B 6 B	59	9 B or 19 D20
.	152	B T20 T14	105	B 5 B OR T20 D15	58	8 B
.	151	B B T17	104	B T18	57	T19
.	150	B B B	103	B 3 B	56	T16 8
.	149	T20 T19 D16	102	B 2 B OR T17 T17	55	5 B
.	148	B B T16	101	B T17	54	T18 or 4 B
.	147	B T19 D20	100	B B	53	3 B
.	146	B T20 D18	99	T19 D14	52	2 B or 20 D16
.	145	B B T15	98	B T16	51	T17
.	144	B T18 D20	97	T19 D20	50	B
.	143	B T19 D18	96	T20 D18	49	17 D16


.	142	B B T14	95	B T15	48	T16 8
.	141	B T17 D20	94	T18 D20	47	15 D16
.	140	B B D20	93	T19 D18	46	14 D16
.	139	B B T13 or T19 B D16	92	B T14	45	T15
.	138	B B D19 or T18 B D17	91	T17 D20	44	12 D16
.	137	T17 B D18	90	B D20	43	11 D16 or 3 D20
.	136	B B D18 or T16 B D19	89	T19 D16	42	T14
.	135	T15 B D20	88	B D19	41	9 D16 or 5 D18
.	134	B B D17	87	T19 D15

2011-04-14T09:32:00.002-06:00

"You can't have apostasy without pasta"
JacobPrimo

Vegetarian Irish Stew

2011-03-17T15:05:00.006-06:00

In honor of the holiday and due to the fact I promised dinner to a vegetarian friend tonight I decided to attempt the classic Irish Stew but make it vegetarian and/or vegan friendly.

Vegetarian Irish Stew

2 cup onion diced
2 cups potato peeled and chopped
2 cups carrots in 2 in. pieces
1 1/2 cups parsnips in 2 inch pieces
1 cup mushrooms rough chopped
2/3 cup red lentils
4 cups vegetable stock
1 can tomato juice.
1/2 t. thyme
1/2 t. rosemary
2 T soy sauce or aminos
Optional : 2 cups of crumbled meat replacement like tempah or Boca burger
1 dark beer porter/stout (note some consider Guinness not vegan friendly)

Chop 2 medium onions (aprox 2 cups) and add to saute pan w/ 2 T oil or butter. Slowly saute to allow the sugars from the onion to release and caramelize. Add all chopped vegetables , cooked onions, & lentils to crock pot or large pan. Cover with liquids(stock, tomato juice, beer). Cook on low in crock pot 6-8 hours or simmer in pan 2.5 to 3.5 hours. Garnish with parsley.

Serve with crusty bread, cold beer, and warm friends

Grilled shrimp, orange, watermelon salad

2010-07-16T18:25:00.002-06:00

From Southern Living

1/2 cup coarsely chopped dry-roasted peanuts
1/2 teaspoon canola oil
1/2 teaspoon sugar
1/2 teaspoon pepper
1/4 teaspoon MORTON Salt
2 cups fully cooked, frozen, shelled edamame (green soybeans), thawed*
16 unpeeled, jumbo fresh shrimp
4 metal or wooden skewers
5 SUNKIST Oranges, divided
1/2 cup hoisin sauce
1/2 cup fresh lime juice
2 garlic cloves, minced
1 teaspoon minced fresh ginger
PAM No-stick Cooking Spray
MORTON Salt to taste
Pepper to taste
6 cups loosely packed torn red leaf lettuce (about 6 ounces)
2 (4-ounce) bags watercress, stems removed
2 pounds red seedless watermelon, peeled and cut into 1/2-inch cubes (about 4 cups cubes)
4 green onions, thinly sliced
1/4 cup chopped fresh cilantro
1/4 cup chopped fresh basil

Preparation

Toss together first 5 ingredients in a small bowl; spread peanut mixture in a single layer on a baking sheet.

Bake at 400° for 10 to 12 minutes, stirring once. Cool.

Cook edamame in boiling water to cover 2 minutes or until crisp-tender; drain. Plunge into ice water to stop cooking process; drain and set aside.

Peel shrimp, leaving tails on; devein, if desired. Thread 4 shrimp onto each skewer. Set aside.

Peel 4 oranges, and cut each into 6 (1/2-inch-thick) slices; set slices aside.

Grate remaining orange to equal 1/2 teaspoon grated rind in a small bowl; squeeze juice from orange into bowl. Add hoisin sauce and next 3 ingredients to bowl, and stir until blended. Remove 2 tablespoons citrus dressing and brush evenly on shrimp. Reserve remaining dressing.

Coat cold cooking grate with cooking spray, and place on grill over medium-high heat (350° to 400°). Place shrimp skewers on grate, and grill 2 minutes on each side or just until done. Salt and pepper to taste.

Arrange lettuce and watercress on 4 serving plates, and top evenly with edamame, orange slices, watermelon, and green onions. Top each salad with 4 shrimp. Sprinkle evenly with cilantro, basil, and peanut mixture; drizzle with reserved citrus dressing.

*2 cups uncooked fresh green shelled soybeans may be substituted for frozen. Boil soybeans in lightly salted water to cover 15 to 20 minutes or until crisp-tender; drain. Plunge into ice water to stop the cooking process; drain. Proceed with recipe as directed.

Coconut-Cashew Basmati Rice Salad

2010-07-04T11:47:00.002-06:00

This is a unique side dish to take to your holiday bbq. I'm making a batch as my side dish for our 4th of July BBQ later today.

Coconut-Cashew Basmati Rice Salad

3 tablespoons peanut oil, plus 1 tablespoon for the cashews
1 medium yellow onion, peeled, halved and thinly sliced
1 clove garlic, chopped
1 tablespoon grated fresh ginger
2 cups basmati rice, rinsed several times in cold water and drained well
Salt and freshly ground pepper
1/4 cup raw cashews, halved
2 cups unsweetened coconut milk
2 cups water
1/2 cup thinly sliced green onion
1/4 cup grated fresh coconut

Heat oil in a medium saucepan. Add onion, garlic and ginger and cook until soft. Add the drained rice, salt and pepper and cook for 3 to 4 minutes.

While the rice is cooking, heat the remaining tablespoon of oil in a small saute pan over medium heat. Add the cashews and cook until lightly golden brown. Drain on paper towels.

Place coconut milk and water in a medium saucepan and bring to a simmer. Add the hot liquid to the rice and bring to a boil. Reduce the heat, cover and cook for about 15 to 20 minutes. When the rice is cooked, remove from the oven and fold in the green onion, and coconut. Spoon the rice onto a platter and garnish with the toasted cashews.

NY Puerto Rican recipes i need to cook.

2010-06-24T10:50:00.001-06:00

buy 5 or so pounds of Carolina rice, a bag of onions, a few bulbs of garlic, and a box of Goya Sazon.

Set 2 cups of water to boil

Dick around on reddit until the water is boiling

Throw in one cup of rice, turn the heat down to simmer and lid that shit

Slice up a small onion

Smash up a clove of garlic

Throw some olive oil or butter into a HOT pan.

Throw the onions and garlic into the pan and fry them till the onion gets glassy. Throw some salt in there.

Add pepper

Toss in half a packet of Sazon and stir till you get a paste. Now you have a ghetto sofrito.

Add your can of beans bean juice and all.

Add a pinch of Cayenne pepper

simmer

Your rice is done.

Throw the beans on top.

Win

Buy yourself a nice meaty pork shoulder. 5 lbs should do nicely.

Bring that fucker home and get out a long, thin knife.

In a pilon (that's a mortar and pestle gringo) smash up a few cloves of Garlic, some sazon, some, salt, some pepper, and some oil. Grind it up GOOD. Now you have another ghetto sofrito.

Take your knife and stab some holes in the pig. Twist the knife around so the holes get nice and wide.

Now, take some of your sofrito and stuff it into the holes. Don't be shy blanco, ram it in there. Use the remainder to roughly coat the outside of the pig. RUB IT. CARESS IT. This pig died so that you may eat. Salt that shit all over the outside and crack some fucking pepper on there.

Set your oven for ~300 degrees

Throw the pork in skin side up and WAIT.

It's going to take like 45 minutes a pound...

A warning: The smell is going to drive you INSANE. You have to wait this part out. Farm work is the best cure.

After an an hour and a half, jab it with a meat thermometer, but remember to not rest it on the bone, or you will get a bad reading.

You should be at around 150-160 degrees. Now comes the fun part. CRANK the stove up to 400 degrees. This will give you an orgasmic, crispy skin that will make your pork rinds taste like year old carboard comparison.

At 170 ish? Pull that out, but DON'T carve it up. You need to wait at least ten minutes otherwise all those sweet, sweet pig juices will dribble the fuck out. WAIT.

Congratulations. You just made Pernil. A five pound Pernil should give you meat for at least a week.

Remembering a friend

2010-06-10T23:15:00.002-06:00

I'm feeling sentimental tonight and remembering a person that even though I only knew for a short while I still considered my friend. JSG you were the polar opposite of me politically but also quite different in personality and temperament but we shared the same intellectual curiosity and background and that always made for interesting conversations. I considered you a friend and I miss those conversations.

Debunking Mormonism

2010-05-26T09:11:00.003-06:00

Mormon Joke

2010-05-21T14:12:00.000-06:00

Q: How many Mormons does it take to change a light bulb?

A: At least six.

One to change the light bulb; one to deny that there was any change made; one to say that we shouldn't focus on the change – only the need for light; one to say we don't teach that the light bulb needed changing in the first place; one to say that the changer was acting for himself and not as an official changer; and one to say "who cares who changed the bulb, don't you feel the burning of the light?".

Happy with Gilt

2010-04-10T11:40:00.004-06:00

Designer clothes and sale prices are always a good thing. I've been buying everything from shoes, to coats, to scarves from Gilt for the past year and I've been happy with it all. It's not open to the public so to join you need a invite. You can use my invite link. It will work for Gilt Men Invites, Gilt Women Invites, Gilt Fuse, and Jetsetter Invites. Happy shopping!

Coolest Guy in Utah

2010-04-09T09:42:00.003-06:00

A good friend of mine and I were having a discussion about people competing for the coolest guy in the world status on search engines. As part of that discussion and probably because he's also named Guy I told him he should be at least the coolest Guy in Utah. Guy Warner you are the coolest guy in Utah.

Time Traveling Password

2010-03-10T13:40:00.002-07:00

If the you from the future came back in time to warn you how would you know? The solution, some say, is to create a password known only to you. It must be absolutely unique, never spoken or written down, and used for the sole purpose of verifying yourself from the future.

Future Jake: Hey it's future Jake I have someone to warn you about

Jake: Oh really that's interesting. You sound familiar

Future Jake: Yeah and I know you're waiting for something right?

Jake: Yep

Future Jake: Ok here it is. Our time traveling password is "(*@#*&). The message is "Kill Sarah Connor"

Jake: Oh shit it's true!

4chan declares youtube porn day

2010-01-05T13:24:00.008-07:00

Apparently 4Chan is planning their first happening of 2010. Apparently recently 4chan chose a average youtube account to do a mass following for him. And YouTube suspended Lukeywest1234 and this is their act of retaliation. Here comes the uber rath of 4chan.

My Dream - By Ogden Nash

2009-11-23T10:51:00.000-07:00

My Dream
by Ogden Nash

This is my dream,
It is my own dream,
I dreamt it.
I dreamt that my hair was kempt.
Then I dreamt that my true love unkempt it.

Thoughts on god.

2009-11-11T11:37:00.003-07:00

I'm a pretty weak agnostic. I'm not convinced there is or isn't a god or all powerful being somewhere. I'm also not convinced that such knowledge is impossible to come by. I've just yet to see it. But in my own contemplation I wonder if there really is a all powerful/all knowing being he is conspicuously impotent and lets innocent children die of disease, people without blame be murdered or injured and lets evil people prosper. All this with the promise of a future potential benefit of a wonderful afterlife? That afterlife comes with the condition that we worship him and follow some arbitrary set of rules? Seriously?

Is the highest form of being in the universe that narcissistic that his requirement for humanity to be saved from the shitty existence he put them in and fails to manage is to bow down and worship him on special days of the week through the control of self appointed religious leaders and arbitrary ritual?

I'm willing to declare that if salvation comes only through the worship of a narcissistic, jealous, cruel, bigoted god and I'd rather cease to exist than spend eternity on my knees in worship of that.

Pub Quiz / Quiz Night in Utah

2009-04-28T10:22:00.004-06:00

I've always thought it would be fun to have a Pub Quiz night here in Salt Lake City but in all my years here I've yet to see one. I went on the website Brainstormer.com looking for a local bar but nothing.

So I'm thinking maybe I should give it a trial run. If I can get enough interested people. So if you'd be down post a comment here or email me and I'll keep you up to date.

If you're a venue looking for a host for a Pub Quiz I'd also be willing to give it a try.

Gilt.com invitations

2009-03-24T14:22:00.005-06:00

Gilt.com sells luxury designers and fashion brands at discount prices. But the site is available by invitation only. I have a select number of invitations available to those that want them. To register use this link http://www.gilt.com/invite/shakeyjake and sign up. Invitations are on a first come / first serve basis.

Happy shopping.

ps if the link doesn't work post a comment here with your email and I'll send you one.

Big Love and the LDS Temple Ceremony

2009-03-16T10:18:00.007-06:00

Here is the controversial temple ceremony depicted in the big love episode last night. There are a few things I noticed:

The Temple clothes were pretty accurate (but something about the veil on the women didn't look right)
The prayer circle was right on, the hand shakes were accurate.
It's not too likely that a believing Mormon would want to risk the sin of loaning their temple recommend.

Specifically HBO left out a lot of the really sensational parts of the endowment that would have made for more controversy. Such as
The pre-1990 death penalties would have been a big ratings getter. And even the current law of concencration:

"you do consecrate yourselves, your time, talents, and everything with which the Lord has blessed you, or with which he may bless you, to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, for the building up of the kingdom of God on the earth and for the establishment of Zion.
Each of you bow your head and say, "Yes.""

The full episode is below. The temple scene begins at minute 27:26

Drinkin' it old school. Pepsi announces throwback soda!

2009-02-17T23:29:00.004-07:00

*

I remember as a kid whenever I wanted to do something a bit on the edge my friends and I would start singing "Give me a mountain and something to do, give me a river, give me a dew" and at that point we would roll down the hill, jump off the cliff or hit the jump.

Well it looks like somebody got wise to the fact that many many Americans, myself included prefer soda made with sugar not High Fructose Corn Syrup. Right now my only option is Mexican Coke I get from gourmet grocers , Mexican markets, and occasionally Walmart or Costco.

I might just have to drink some mountain dew and go cliff jumping for old times sake.

*these are the new registered trademark logos.

The Mitt Romney Invocation prayer

2008-12-23T14:36:00.002-07:00

With all the hubbub concerning the Obama selection of Rick Warren to deliver the invocation for the Presidential Inauguration it made me wonder. If Mitt Romney had been elected who would he have chosen to deliver the prayer. The first two name that came to my mind were Thomas S Monson and Boyd K Packer. One is the "prophet" and the second is the senior of the Twelve Apostles in the LDS church.

Politically it would be a terrible idea to play the Mormon card. But religiously I can see someone like BKP using Romney's beliefs and pressing the issue to get up there.

Getting rid of the Vundo trojan - what worked for me. (link to free download)

2008-12-14T22:28:00.012-07:00

I got a email from a friend who I knew was just signing up and using social networking sites like Facebook and Myspace. The email said something to the effect of come view my profile. My bad.... I got the first malware, virus, trojan problem of many many years.

It turns out I had the vundo trojan. In the past I ran AVG anti-virus but I've been running Avira antivirus for a while and have been very happy with it. However it wasn't caught. So I tried Avira(if found things no luck), I tried the old stand by AVG again no luck, then I went to another old friend Ad-aware. It found the trojan but it came back after each restart. I went to Spybot Search and Destroy, and then F-secure online scanner after a random google search. Again both found the troubles but the removal ended after I rebooted. The interesting part about the reboot is I noticed the Microsoft Auto-Update would be disabled by the trojan and some sort of batch file ran on command.com. So what worked? They have a FREE VERSION and a CHEAP FULL VERSION

Malware Bytes Free version download.com

Malwarebytes' Anti-Malware -Full version - cheap $24

btw the difference I noticed was that Malwarebytes saved some file deletions until the next restart. That seemed to keep them from coming back.

Jake

Birthday Kid owns it on Price is Right!

2008-11-18T17:05:00.002-07:00

Kid completely kills it on The Price is Right

Economics of the NY Times Prank.

2008-11-13T11:07:00.013-07:00

How much did the NY Times prank cost?

Yesterday a group of pranksters decided to print up a fake NY Times declaring a end to the war in Iraq along with a handful of funny and progressive news items. Over my morning coffee I decided to estimate the costs of the prank.

Right now newsprint costs $747 per metric ton. You get about 110 pages per pound and 2204.62 pounds per metric ton. So it's $747 in raw costs for 242,508 pages.

A 14 page newspaper * 1,200,000 copies is 16,800,000 pages. 16,800,100/ 110/ 2204.62 =69.28 * $747

$51,752.16 in raw material costs nor the newsprint.

I estimate 1 to 1 costs for production, plates, ink, labor, transportation for another $51,752.16

I'll assume that like minded volunteers handed out the papers and did all other related work for free.

Estimated Total: $103,504.32

So 100k plus for a prank without any foreseeable benefit among the participants. That's quite a pricey prank.

*update....according to a New York Post article, Andy Bichlbaum of Yes Men claims the cost was $100,000. Apparently I was pretty close

AIG bailout email - spam for people bad at math

2008-09-29T13:44:00.003-06:00

There is something about large numbers that make people lose their ability to do math. Below is a email I've received to completely unrelated parties in their bid to educate me via email forwards. As usually people just not their head an fail to use the tiniest amount of critical thinking skills.

Here is why this email is in error $85 billion divided by 200 million people is $425 each not $425,000. $425 trillion is what is needed to make the scenario below work.

FWD:FWD:FWD:I'm against the $85,000,000,000.00 bailout of AIG.

Instead, I'm in favor of giving $85,000,000,000 to America in

a "We Deserve It Dividend".

To make the math simple, let's assume there are 200,000,000

bonafide U.S. Citizens 18+.
Our population is about 301,000,000 +/- counting every man, woman
and child. So 200,000,000 might be a fair stab at adults 18 and up..
So divide 200 million adults 18+ into $85 billon that equals
$425,000.00.
My plan is to give $425,000 to every person 18+ as a
We Deserve It Dividend.
Of course, it would NOT be tax free.
So let's assume a tax rate of 30%.
Every individual 18+ has to pay $127,500.00 in taxes.
That sends $25,500,000,000 right back to Uncle Sam.
But it means that every adult 18+ has $297,500.00 in their pocket.
A husband and wife has $595,000.00.
What would you do with $297,500.00 to $595,000.00 in your family?
Pay off your mortgage - housing crisis solved.
Repay college loans - what a great boost to new grads
Put away money for college - it'll be there
Save in a bank - create money to loan to entrepreneurs.
Buy a new car - create jobs
Invest in the market - capital drives growth
Pay for your parent's medical insurance - health care improves
Enable Deadbeat Dads to come clean - or else
Remember this is for every adult U S Citizen 18+ including the folks
who lost their jobs at Lehman Brothers and every other company
that is cutting back. And of course, for those serving in our Armed
Forces.
If we're going to re-distribute wealth let's really do it...instead of
trickling out
a puny $1000.00 ( "vote buy" ) economic incentive that is being proposed
by one of our candidates for President.
If we're going to do an $85 billion bailout, let's bail out every adult
U S Citizen 18+!
As for AIG - liquidate it.
Sell off its parts.
Let American General go back to being American General.
Sell off the real estate.
Let the private sector bargain hunters cut it up and clean it up.
Here's my rationale. We deserve it and AIG doesn't.
Sure it's a crazy idea that can "never work."
But can you imagine the Coast-To-Coast Block Party!
How do you spell Economic Boom?
I trust my fellow adult Americans to know how to use the $85 Billion
We Deserve It Dividend more than I do the geniuses at AIG or in
Washington DC.
And remember, This plan only really costs $59.5 Billion because
$25.5 Billion is returned
instantly in taxes to Uncle Sam.
Ahhh...I feel so much better getting that off my chest.
Kindest personal regards,
PS: Feel free to pass this along to your pals as it's either good for a
laugh

or a tear or a very sobering thought on how to best use $85 Billion!!

Mazda 6 keyless entry reprogramming

2008-08-20T19:14:00.003-06:00

My Mazda 6 keyless entry wasn't working. Rather than paying the dealership $80 bones I found the reprogramming instructions online.

2003-04 Mazda 6 REMOTE PROGRAMMING

Step 1: Open drivers door and leave open.

Step 2: Lock and unlock the driver’s door using the power door lock switch on the door.

Step 3: Insert key into the ignition.

Step 4: Turn key to on position and return to off position. (IMPORTANT - use ON position NOT ACC position). Do this 3 times within 10 seconds. Leave key in the ignition.

Step 5: Open and close the driver’s door 3 times. (Door should be left open after this step).

Step 6: ECU should respond by locking and unlocking the doors.

Step 7: Press any button on remote #1 twice. ECU responds by locking and unlocking the car doors.

Step 8: Press any button on remote #2 (etc.) twice. Each time the ECU will respond by locking & unlocking the doors.

Step 9: Remove the key from the ignition and the ECU will respond a final time with a series of door locks and unlocks. You're done!

If this worked for you post a comment!

Chipotle- Gorgonzola steaks

2008-07-25T14:12:00.002-06:00

Chipotle- Gorgonzola steaks

3 tablespoons olive oil, divided
1/2 pound fresh shiitake mushrooms, stemmed, sliced
3 garlic cloves, minced
1 1/2 cups whipping cream
1 cup crumbled Gorgonzola cheese (about 4 ounces)
2 teaspoons minced canned chipotle chiles* (from canned chipotles in adobo)

8 filet mignon steaks

Heat 2 tablespoons olive oil in heavy large skillet over medium heat. Add shiitake mushrooms and sauté until soft, about 4 minutes. Add garlic and stir 1 minute. Add whipping cream and bring to boil. Reduce heat to medium and simmer sauce until thickened, about 4 minutes. Stir in Gorgonzola cheese and chipotles. Season sauce to taste with salt and pepper. DO AHEAD Sauce can be made 2 hours ahead. Let stand at room temperature.

Sprinkle steaks with salt and freshly ground black pepper. Heat remaining 1 tablespoon olive oil in another heavy large skillet. Cook steaks in skillet until brown on both sides and cooked to desired doneness, about 5 minutes per side for medium-rare. Rewarm sauce. Transfer 1 steak to each of 8 plates. Pour sauce over steaks and serve.

*A favorite of mine from Epicurious

Don Wildman Profile - The Circuit - Esquire

2008-06-28T22:31:00.001-06:00

The World's Healthiest 75-Year-Old Man

Don Wildman Profile - The Circuit - Esquire

Don Wildman can run like a Marine, snowboard like an Olympian, and bike like a Tour de France champion. Not bad for a 75-year-old. Geeze

I thought the filthy fifty kicked my ass

The word Gospel and it's usage

2008-05-10T10:29:00.002-06:00

The English noun gospel comes is the translation of the Greek word εὐαγγέλιον (euaggelos). It's normally translated as "good news" or as a verb to preach the good news. Interesting enough the word isn't common in Greek Literature. One of the best known usages is in Aristophanes. It is generally used for bringing news of victories of other events.

The word really got it's current usage as both a noun and a verb from the letters of Paul. A good example is how Paul refers to "the gospel of god" of which he is the apostle in Thess. 2:2 & Cor 11:7. The evidence suggests it was the Pauline communities that the present usage of the word took hold and spread to the broader Christian communities. It's this later anachronistic Christian vocabulary that BOM writers dubiously use.
If you look at the Gospels of the New Testament the use is scattered. The noun "gospel" is missing from both the Gospel of John as well as the Johannine Epistles. It is used often as a verb.

The Gospel of Luke does not use the word "gospel" as a noun. However, both Luke and Acts use the word as a verb meaning "to announce" or "preach".

The Gospel of Matthew uses it not in the modern or Pauline definition. It's strictly Jesus' message about the coming of the kingdom, like the message of John the Baptist, not regarding belief in Jesus see Matt 4:23 & 9:25.

The Gospel of Mark is interesting there are uses of "gospel" like Mark 1:1 that are clear additions of a later scribe. But Mark 1:1 does see to be a pointer to Mark 1:14-15 showing a transition from John the Baptists preaching of repentance to Jesus' own call of repentance and message of the kingdom. Also unique in the Markan Gospel are the passages that are source matterial for Matthew but Matthew specifically omits the usage of the word Gospel. Like Mk 1:15/Mt4:17, Mk8:35/Mt16:25.

By contrast, authors in The Book of Mormon use a spiritual vocabulary such as the use of the word "gospel" as a noun that post dates the life of Jesus and is more reflective of 2nd century Christian communities. Good examples of this are:

Ether 4:18
Therefore, repent all ye ends of the earth, and come unto me, and believe in my gospel, and be baptized in my name; for he that believeth and is baptized shall be saved; but he that believeth not shall be damned; and signs shall follow them that believe in my name.

Mormon 9:22-24
For behold, thus said Jesus Christ, the Son of God, unto his disciples who should tarry, yea, and also to all his disciples, in the hearing of the multitude: Go ye into all the world, and preach the gospel to every creature; And he that believeth and is baptized shall be saved, but he that believeth not shall be damned; And these signs shall follow them that believe--in my name shall they cast out devils; they shall speak with new tongues; they shall take up serpents; and if they drink any deadly thing it shall not hurt them; they shall lay hands on the sick and they shall recover...

Here is a great example of many of the repeated problems with the Book of Mormon. Ether predates Paul and the early Christian writers by some 2000 years but chooses this post-Jesus Christian vocabulary usage. Oh and for the record both these passages are just quotations from Mark 16:15-18. Which first is a problem just to crib from the New Testament but that happens a lot and isn't problematic for a lot of TBM. However this is even more unique. Mark 16:9-20 is referred to as the long ending of Mark. It's a late addition. It's not part of the original text. The ending is absent from the two oldest Greek manuscripts, from the Old Latin codex Bobiensis , the Sinaitic Syriac manuscript, about one hundred Armenian manuscripts, and the two oldest Georgian manuscripts. It was unknown to Clement of Alexandria and Origen. Eusebius and Jerome specifically state the ending was unknown to them and was absent from the oldest Greek copies known to them

It's a bit condemning that the BOM not only quotes Mark from the KJV New Testament, but in doing so chooses a non-authentic section added by a scribe in the 2nd century

Interesting Guacamole

2008-05-03T16:04:00.001-06:00

New Wave Guacamole 2 ripe avocados, peeled, pitted
3 tablespoons fresh lime juice
2 tablespoons minced fresh ginger
1 tablespoon chopped seeded jalapeño or serrano chili
2 teaspoons minced garlic
1 teaspoon curry powder

Peanut oil
1 12-ounce package wonton wrappers

1 cup diced peeled seeded cucumber
1/4 cup chopped fresh cilantro

Preparation
Place first 6 ingredients in large bowl. Mash with fork to coarse puree. Press plastic wrap onto surface and chill.
Pour oil into heavy saucepan to depth of 3 inches and heat to 375°F Cut wonton wrappers diagonally in half, forming triangles. Working in batches, fry wontons until crisp, about 30 seconds per side. Using slotted spoon, transfer to paper towels and sprinkle with salt. (Guacamole and wontons can be made 4 hours ahead. Cool wontons, then store in airtight bag.)

Mix cucumber and cilantro into guacamole. Season to taste with salt and pepper. Serve with wonton chips.

One-Minute Salsa

2008-05-03T15:58:00.000-06:00

One-Minute Salsa
Makes about 1 cup

The salsa will keep for 2 days in the refrigerator. Reseason to taste before serving. Make sure to drain both the tomatoes and the jalapeños before processing.

1/2 small red onion
1/4 cup fresh cilantro leaves
1 tablespoon lime juice
1 clove garlic , peeled
2 tablespoons pickled jalapeño peppers , drained
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 can (14 1/2 ounces) diced tomatoes , drained

Pulse onion, cilantro, lime juice, garlic, jalapeños, and salt in food processor until roughly chopped, about five 1-second pulses. Add tomatoes and pulse until chopped, about two 1-second pulses. Transfer mixture to fine-mesh strainer and drain briefly. Serve.

The Best Fresh Margaritas

2008-05-03T15:55:00.002-06:00

The Best Fresh Margaritas
We were tired of margaritas made with little more than ice, tequila, and artificially flavored syrups. Could we come up with the ultimate margarita: a balanced blend of fresh citrus flavors and tequila? We used correct proportions (equal parts juice, orange liqueur, and tequila) for balance; the right alcohol (Triple Sec and a reposado tequila made from 100 percent blue agave) for a mellow, delicate flavor; and the best citrus mix (lemon and lime zest steeped in their juices) for refreshing flavor. Finish with a bit of sugar and a pinch of salt.

4 teaspoons grated lime zest
1/2 cup lime juice from 2 to 3 medium limes
4 teaspoons grated lemon zest
1/2 cup lemon juice from 2 to 3 medium lemons
1/4 cup superfine sugar
Pinch table salt
2 cups crushed ice
1 cup 100 percent agave tequila, preferably reposado
1 cup Triple Sec
Combine lime zest and juice, lemon zest and juice, sugar, and salt in large liquid measuring cup; cover with plastic wrap and refrigerate until flavors meld, 4 to 24 hours.
Divide 1 cup crushed ice between 4 or 6 margarita or double old-fashioned glasses. Strain juice mixture into 1-quart pitcher or cocktail shaker. Add tequila, Triple Sec, and remaining crushed ice; stir or shake until thoroughly combined and chilled, 20 to 60 seconds. Strain into ice-filled glasses; serve immediately.

2008-04-05T10:02:00.003-06:00

Creamy Goat Cheese Pasta with Roasted Asparagus

2 bunches asparagus (2 pounds total), tough ends removed
4 tablespoons butter, cut into small pieces
12 ounces cavatappi or other short pasta
1 small log soft goat cheese (5 ounces), crumbled
2 to 3 tablespoons snipped fresh chives, for garnish

Preheat oven to 450 degrees. Bring a large pot of water to a boil for pasta. Place asparagus on a large rimmed baking sheet; dot with 1 tablespoon butter, and season with salt and pepper. Roast until tender, tossing occasionally, 10 to 15 minutes; cut into 2-inch lengths.
While asparagus is roasting, generously salt boiling water. Add pasta, and cook until al dente, according to package instructions. Set aside 1 1/2 cups pasta water; drain pasta and return to pot.
In a medium bowl, combine goat cheese, remaining 3 tablespoons butter, and 1/2 cup pasta water. Season with salt and pepper, and whisk until smooth. Add goat-cheese mixture and asparagus to pasta; toss to combine, adding more pasta water if necessary for sauce to coat pasta. Serve pasta garnished with chives.
(from everyday food)

Interesting

2008-03-18T11:33:00.001-06:00

More Info Here

Latin Pickup Lines

2008-03-13T09:52:00.002-06:00

Latin pick-up lines

Do you come here often?
Frequentasne hunc locum?

Haven't we met somewhere before?
Nonne alicubi prius convenimus?

What's your sign?
Quo signo nata est?

You strike me as a very deep person.
Apparet te habere ingenium profondum.

I think fate brought us together.
Credo fatum nos coegisse.

Your place or mine?
Apudne te vel me?

A couple nice 80's covers by Radiohead

2008-03-10T14:07:00.001-06:00

New Order - Ceremony

The Smith's - The Headmaster Ritual

Stars

2008-03-04T14:44:00.000-07:00

Fundy's

2008-02-25T11:25:00.001-07:00

"Fundamentalist Christians believe the Genesis to be the inerrant word of god. I wonder what what they think about Phil Collins' later music?"
- Signature line of Phaedrus Ut

My superbowl appetizer

2008-02-03T10:47:00.000-07:00

I wanted something completely unique and fun for the superbowl or a party appetizer. This caught my eye.

Shrimp with Green Goddess sauce

Sauce
1-2 large garlic cloves
2 cups mayonnaise
1 cup (packed) chopped fresh parsley
1/4 cup chopped fresh chives
1/4 cup chopped green onions (white and pale green parts only)
3 tablespoons chopped fresh tarragon
4 canned anchovy fillets
1 tablespoon rice vinegar

Shrimp

4 pounds uncooked unpeeled jumbo shrimp (about 75)

Once - Noor ho tebe - Miluju tebe

2008-01-13T22:40:00.005-07:00

In reading the English Subtitles for the movie once I noticed that it lists her words as "Noor ho tebe". I researched this and apparently the subtitles are in error.

Even the actress has said herself that she says "Miluju tebe" meaning I love you. The characters played by Glen Hansard and Markéta Irglová are listed only as Guy and Girl.

Guy -- How do you say "Do you love him ?"
Girl -- Milujes ho ?
Guy -- Milujes ho ?
Girl -- Miluji tebe

I don't know Czech but I've seen her response as both "Miluju tebe" and "Miluji tebe". I'm assuming it's a verb conjugation difference.

Shrimp Pad Thai

2008-01-09T18:41:00.000-07:00

Pad Thai Recipe: Recipes: Food Network

1 (14-ounce) package medium dried rice noodles
1/4 cup fish sauce
2 tablespoon good-quality soy sauce
4 tablespoons tamarind juice
1/2 cup white vinegar, or rice wine vinegar
1/4 cup sugar
1 cup preserved ground radish
1/4 cup vegetable oil, for frying
4 cloves garlic, finely chopped
1 1/2 pounds large shrimp, peeled, with tails on
1 teaspoon cayenne pepper
1 tablespoon paprika
4 cups bean sprouts
8 ounces tofu cake, fried, cut into small cubes
1 cup finely ground raw peanuts, roasted (should be raw and then roasted)
1 bunch garlic chives, chopped
3 eggs, beaten, cooked, rolled up, and shredded
Lime wedges, optional, for garnish

Soak noodles in hot water until slightly limp; drain and set aside. In a medium bowl, combine fish sauce, soy sauce, tamarind juice, vinegar, sugar, and radish; stir until sugar is dissolved and then set aside. Prepare and measure all of the other ingredients before beginning to cook.
Heat oil in a wok or large skillet over high heat. When oil is hot, working quickly, add garlic and shrimp and toss with wooden spoons until shrimp are about halfway done. Add cayenne pepper and paprika and toss to combine. Add noodles and radish mixture and toss well. Add bean sprouts and tofu and toss. Add peanuts and garlic chives and toss. When shrimp is just cooked through and all the ingredients are heated through, remove from heat. Garnish with shredded eggs and lime wedges, if desired. Serve immediately.

Once

2007-12-24T22:17:00.001-07:00

"miluju tebe" in Czech means "I love you"

Hiding the details the Book of Mormon

2007-12-15T12:01:00.000-07:00

The new Joseph Smith manual used in the LDS church for next year contains almost the entire text of the Wentworth Letter almost word for word. The only part missing looks like this in the manual: "...This book... tells us that our savior made..."

Strange??? I wonder what they are hiding? Let's see...here is the full quote of the redacted text:

"In this important and interesting book the history of ancient America is unfolded, from its first settlement by a colony that came from the Tower of Babel, at the confusion of languages to the beginning of the fifth century of the Christian Era. We are informed by these records that America in ancient times has been inhabited by two distinct races of people. The first were called Jaredites, and came directly from the Tower of Babel. The second race came directly from the city of Jerusalem, about six hundred years before Christ. They were principally Israelites, of the descendants of Joseph. The Jaredites were destroyed about the time that the Israelites came from Jerusalem, who succeeded them in the inheritance of the country. The principal nation of the second race fell in battle towards the close of the fourth century. The remnant are the Indians that now inhabit this country. This book also tells us that..."

The growing trend in Mormon apologetic scholarship is the Limited Geography Theory for locating the events in the Book of Mormon somewhere in Mesoamerica. This is because items like native DNA, archeology, and common sense suggest that not all native americans are decendants of Lehi as taught for so long. Also the only cultures that could have even remotely match are in Mesoamerica. So they suggest that Lehi(the first prophet that sailed to the Americas from Jerusalem) and family came into an existing area near or among the Maya(but never mention this great culture) and the Nephi artifacts are hidden in the jungle within or near Mayan cities.

But thar really begs the question . . . who is more likely to know a true history of the people in the Book of Mormon? Joseph was visited annually by not only Moroni but according to Joseph and other early church leaders he was also visited by Nephi, Alma, and Mormon. The Wentworth letter says:

The angel appeared to me three times the same night and unfolded the same things. After having received many visits from the angels of God unfolding the majesty and glory of the events that should transpire in the last days, on the morning of the 22nd of September, A.D. 1827, the angel of the Lord delivered the records into my hands.

He knew enough of the history of the people of the America's to entertain his family with their stories. According to his mother he would share stories from his angelic instruction:

From this time forth, Joseph continued to receive instructions from the Lord, and we continued to get the children together every evening for the purpose of listening while he gave us a relation of the same…. He would describe the ancient inhabitants of this continent, their dress, mode of traveling, and the animals upon which they rode; their cities, their buildings, with every particular; their mode of warfare; and also their religious worship. This he would do with as much ease, seemingly, as if he had spent his whole life among them(Smith, Lucy Mack. History of Joseph Smith)

Joseph then translated the Plates of Lehi and then the same story over from the Plates of Nephi. With all these resources there seems to be a growing need for some in the Church to hide or avoid what Joseph taught rather clearly in the Wentworth letter and numerous other places. Is it reasonable to think that the man who was tutored personally by at least 4 BOM prophets, who translated the text of their arrival from two different perspectives, and who did this all by direct inspiration and revelation somehow can't even get the most basic details right?

Just another in the long list of logical acrobatics currently used to try to salvage the Book of Mormon.

Jake

It's me! Every girl ever.

2007-12-12T14:17:00.000-07:00

best of craigslist : It's me! Every girl ever.

Knock knock Oh hi, how's it going? It's me! Every girl ever. I'm really looking forward to this date. I'm not nearly as attractive as you remember me being because when we met the bar was dark and you were drunk.

Come on in. Let's start off with the unavoidable tour of my incredibly typical post-college-girl apartment. You'll notice that I went ahead and purchased everything that Ikea and Pier 1 have ever produced. \

There's my decorative birdcage over there even though I don't have a bird, and there's my gay wicker basket with bamboo poles in it. I don't know what the hell that's thing's all about, but I bought it. Hey check it out, I have more candles in here than a Roman Catholic Church. Doesn't it smell like Hazelnut!? If I were to light all of my candles at once you could see my apartment from space! I fucking love candles!

Come on into the living room. Oh, I see you met my cat there. That's "Freddy Paws Jr." Why don't you pet him and act like you like cats even though you hate cats? There you go. Oh, he took a little swing at your eye there huh? Yeah, he'll do that.

Hey, let's check out the kitchen. Hey look at my refrigerator. There are pictures all over it! Look at all these pictures of me and my equally vacuous friends from college! We were so crazy! You can tell we're really good friends because our faces are all pressed up against each other like that. And check it out, we're holding up alcoholic beverages to the camera in every single picture. That's to prove that we were partying. College was so fun! But of course I don't talk to any of these girls anymore because now they're all bitches.

Let's go back into the hallway! Hey, before we leave I'm going to go in the bathroom for ten minutes for some mysterious reason. Why don't you sit awkwardly in my big, stupid, round papizan chair over there while you wait for me. It's like you're sitting in a hug! Be right back... Sorry that took a half an hour, I don't know what the hell I was doing in there. Let's go!

Wow! Thanks for opening my car door for me! I'm totally going to blow that meaningless gesture out of proportion and delude myself into thinking that you're a really good guy because that's what I want to believe. Well, here we are at the restaurant. No thanks waiter, I don't need to see a menu, just bring me some expensive things.

Hey I know, while we wait, I'll tell you all about my unspeakably boring job. I hate my boss. He's a jerk! I might get another job. Maybe something in pharmaceutical sales. Now let's talk about my family. I love my family. I want you to love my family. I want my family to love you. I want you to make love to my family! I want you to go golfing with my semi-retarded brother Travis. That would be so God damned cute!

Wow! I can't believe I ordered all this food! I have no intention of eating any of it. No thanks waiter, we don't need a box. Just throw it out.

Hey, I've got an idea, let's go to a bar and have an after dinner drink! It'll be great, it will be just like how we're drinking here, only it will be louder and we'll have to stand up. Come on! See, isn't this better? Oh hey, what a coincidence. Look over there! It's a group of my friends that I knew was going to be here. Let's go over there so that they can judge you!

Hey, I have to go to the bathroom for a half an hour again for some reason. You can stay here and talk to my unbelievably hideous friend Christine! Christine's so ugly she scares kids! Talk to her! She has a job and a family that she wants to talk to you about too. Be right back.

I'm back! Sorry I was gone for three hours, there was a line. I want to go home now. Well here we are at my door again. This was really fun for me and not you. You should pretend like we're going to do it again sometime! Maybe I'll see you at Target a few months from now and we can avoid eye contact because you never called me.

Here, have this awkward goodnight kiss that's as empty as my soul. Good night!

Pear Sausage stuffing

2007-11-19T17:23:00.001-07:00

Stuffing with Pears and Sausage
8 cups (1/2-inch) cubed sourdough bread (about 12 ounces)
1 pound turkey Italian sausage
Cooking spray
5 cups chopped onion (about 2 pounds)
2 cups chopped celery
1 cup chopped carrot
8-ounce package pre-sliced mushrooms
2 cups (1/2-inch) cubed peeled Bartlett pears (about 2 medium)
1½ tablespoons chopped fresh basil
2 teaspoons chopped fresh tarragon
1 teaspoon salt
1½ cups fat-free, less-sodium chicken broth
1/2 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
Preheat oven to 425 degrees.
Arrange bread in a single layer on a baking sheet. Bake at 425 degrees for 9 minutes or until golden. Place in a large bowl.
Remove casings from sausage. Heat a large nonstick skillet over medium-high heat. Coat pan with cooking spray. Add sausage, and cook for 8 minutes or until browned, stirring to crumble. Add sausage to bread cubes, tossing to combine. Set aside.
Return pan to medium-high heat. Add onion, celery and carrot; sauté 10 minutes or until onion begins to brown. Stir in mushrooms; cook 4 minutes.
Stir in pear, basil, tarragon and salt; cook 4 minutes or until pear begins to soften, stirring occasionally. Add pear mixture to bread mixture, tossing gently to combine. Stir in broth and pepper.
Place bread mixture in a 13-by-9-inch baking dish coated with cooking spray; cover with foil. Bake at 425 for 20 minutes. Uncover; bake stuffing an additional 15 minutes or until top of stuffing is crisp.

Book of Mormon Translation Timeline

2007-11-09T10:03:00.002-07:00

LDS apologists like to say that the Book of Mormon was written in only 60 days and what a amazing feat this was. However, what they fail to say is this claim means 60 different individual days "translation". Not the chronological passing of time from when Joseph Smith started to when it ended.

Using Thursday June 25, 1829 as the day translation was completed. From when Joseph first saw the plates it was 5 years 9 months. From when Joseph first physically visited the plates it's 4 years 9 months or when he took possession of the plates it's 1 year 9 months. When he first translated from the plates (HC 1:19) it's 1 year 7 months. When he started translation with Martin Harris it's 1 year 2 months

To say it was done in just 60 days is very misleading bordering on dishonest. The sixty day number is thrown out implying writing the book is a impossible task in that time frame for a uneducated farm boy. The test implies that there are actual plates and not an author and writing can't begin with out "the plates".

However a critic doesn't need to assume there are actual plates just some method of authorship. If someone starts telling stories about a magic book that they are going to be able to translate it's reasonable that he started working on the BOM the first time he told a story about it.

Here is the timeline:

1822- Joseph Smith finds a seer stone while digging a well by his farmhouse

Sept 1823-Joseph Says he sees Moroni in a vision in his room and is allowed to see the plates but not take them.

Sept 1824-Joseph visits the plates again, but is not allowed to take themSept 1825-Joseph visits the plates yet again.

March 1826-Joseph is arrested for "glass looking" with the seer stone to find buried treasure

Sept 1826-Joseph visits the plates

Sept 1827-Joseph finally takes possession of the plates

April 1828-Joseph begins translation of Book of Lehi with Martin Harris as scribeJune 1828-Manuscripts for Book of Lehi are lost

July 1828- Joseph receives revelation telling him his gift of translating is taken away for a season

Sept 1828-Joseph starts re-translation of Book of Mormon without any instructions from God or any kind of revelation. He just does it on his own, the really odd thing is he doesn't attempt to re-translate the Book of Lehi, and skips 1Nephi, 2Nephi, Jacob, Enos, Jarom, Omni and Words of Mormon. He continues where he left off chronologically at the end of the Book of Lehi, or the beginning of Mosiah. His wife Emma served as scribe.

April 1829-Joseph begins the "rapid-fire" translation now with Oliver Cowdery as scribe

April 1829- Oliver Cowdery wants to translate with the magic rock in the hat, is granted the ability, then God changed his mind because Oliver isn't patient enough.

May 1829-Joseph receives revelation not to re-translate Book of Lehi and to replace it with Books of Nephi. The Lord also tells Joseph that "NOW" his gift of translating is "restored" hmm...

June 1829-Transcript is finished, witnesses "see" the plates and Joseph gives them back to Moroni.

Reference
http://www.exmormon.org/exmoblogs.html

Easy Lettuce Wraps

2007-11-07T10:31:00.000-07:00

Jake's Lettuce wraps: Serves 2-3 people

8-10 ounces pork, chicken, or turkey
1/2 onion sliced
1-2 cloves garlic minced
soy sauce
Sesame oil
Hoisin sauce
1 head of lettuce

Optional:MushroomsGreen onionsWater ChesnutsChili pastechinese 5 spice

Start with your choice of meat. Sliced boneless chicken, pork, ground turkey, or pork. They all work good. 8-12 ounces. In a hot pan brown the meat and cook about halfway then add onion sliced thin, garlic minced , 1 tsp sesame oil, 2 T. soy sauce. Optional to add at this point: Mushrooms, green onions, water chesnuts, Chinese five spice, chili paste.

Cook in pan until veggies are cooked but not mushy or soft. Seperate 1 head of lettucce into individual leaves. I do this by first removing the core of the head of lettuce. I do this by giving the center core a good hit down on the counter holding the head in both hands. This loosens it and it should pop right out.

To serve: spread hoisin sauce inside of lettuce leaf and add a helping of the prepared mixture.
Serve with rice & cold beer

10,000 protest against war on Boston Common - The Boston Globe

2007-10-29T11:29:00.000-06:00

10,000 protest against war on Boston Common - The Boston Globe

It's amazing to me how so little anti-war protesting is going on. Is it a symptom of the lack of openness people feel in in the country. If you attend an anti war rally you show up on the secret now fly list and possibly get shipped to a secret detention center. With a war and administration as unpopular as this their needs to be some sort of answer as to why.

Of course one solution is to blame the slacker/apathy of the Gen Y Gen X set. Who knows

Polygamist Leader Marries 2 Teen Sisters

2007-10-04T14:56:00.000-06:00

Their names were Maria and Sarah Lawrence. In June, 1841, Joseph was appointed guardian of the minor heirs of the Edward Lawrence and trustee for them and of an estate of $3,831. In 1842 both girls begain living with Joseph and Emma in their home. In May of 1843 Joseph married both girls. He was 37 and they were 19 and 17 years old.

I have a problem with this. A 37 year old man taking 2 teen sisters as polygamist brides and he does so from a extreme position of power. He is their prophet, he is their legal guardian, and they lived with him in his home in Nauvoo. Is there some angle which this type of relationship should be considered acceptable? Here is a good summary of the situation:

In June 1841, Joseph Smith, Hyrum Smith and William Law had assumed the
responsibility of the deceased Edward Lawrence's estate valued at $7,750.06.
Joseph was named as guardian of the Lawrence children. Somehow during his period
of indecision, William Law found out that Maria Lawrence was sealed as a wife to
Joseph; in fact, Law, as he later stated, found Joseph in a compromising
situation with Maria on 12 October 1843. Two weeks later, 26 October 1843,
Joseph ostensibly sealed Maria for time to John M. Bernhisel, an outsider to the
Lawrence estate arrangements. But in January 1844, Joseph apparently felt this
would no longer calm the angered William Law. The day after Joseph and William's
final confrontation, Joseph began arrangements to relinquish the estate affairs
entirely. From the ninth to the twenty-third, William Clayton was working with
the Prophet preparing the transfer of the estate affairs to John Taylor.
Undoubtedly, if William Law, one of the appointed trustees of the estate, I
'claimed' that Joseph had not only extorted the funds of the estate, but had
also committed adultery with the eldest child of whom he was personal guardian,
that would make an explosive expose.... Law appeared before the first sitting of
the Grand Jury of the Hancock County circuit court to swear out charges against
Joseph. Law filed charges and presented such evidence that the Grand Jury
authorized an indictment against Joseph Smith for 'adultery and fornication.'
While Law made oath that Joseph 'live[d]...an open state of adultery and
fornication' with 'certain women,' the only woman he named was Maria Lawrence.
Law testified of two dates when Joseph Smith allegedly committed the illegal
acts—specifically the one date already mentioned, 12 October 1843, and the other
date 1 January 1844, the day Law began his diary("Joseph Smith's Introduction of
Temple Ordinances and the 1844 Mormon Succession Question, Andrew Ehat M.A.
thesis, Brigham Young University)

Todd Compton's In Sacred Loneliness describes it this way:

The marriage to the Lawrence sisters became public knowledge when William Law,
Joseph's second counselor in the First Presidency, became alienated from the
prophet......On May 23 he filed suit against the Mormon leader in Hancock County
Circuit Court, at Carthage, charging that Smith had been living with Maria
Lawrence 'in an open state of adultery' from October 12, 1843, to the day of the
suit. In response, Smith flatly denied polygamy in a speech delivered on May 26:
'[The charges against me are false].....What a thing it is for a man to be
accused of committing adultery, and having seven wives, when I can only find
one.....[I can prove them all perjurers.]' As polygamy was illegal under US law,
Smith had little choice but to repudiate the practice. (In Sacred Loneliness:
The Plural Wives of Joseph Smith, pp. 476-477.)

From the FARMS Review of Compton:

The Lawrence sisters continued to live in the Mansion House after the Partridge
sisters moved to other Nauvoo homes. In Sacred Loneliness mentions several
reliable documents indicating that Emma approved and was present when Maria and
Sarah Lawrence were sealed to Joseph Smith (see pp. 743–44). So the author's
tentative conclusion is puzzling: "It is entirely possible that she gave her
permission for these marriages, as Emily asserts" (p. 475). The Lawrence family
was converted in Canada and moved to Illinois before the father died, after
which time Joseph Smith was appointed guardian of the children who had not
reached legal majority. The Prophet managed the whole estate under court
supervision. Ex-Mormon William Law gave exaggerated figures in later accusing
Joseph Smith of mismanagement

Shrimp with Pine nuts

2007-09-24T19:57:00.000-06:00

Shrimp with Pine nuts

24 jumbo shrimp peeled and deveined
3 C. sliced mushrooms washed and sliced

1/4 inch thick1
1/2 T. roasted pine nuts
6 handfuls fresh spinach leaves
6 C. cooked vermicelli pasta
4T. butter
2 T. fresh garlic mincedLemon Butter Sauce
1 T. shallots minced
1 T. fresh garlic minced
1/2 C. dry white wine1 C. heavy cream
1/2 C. lemon juice freshly squeezed
1/8 t. white pepper
1 lb. lightly salted butter cut into tablespoons

Preheat oven to 350°F. Wash spinach and remove stems before drying leaves between paper towels. Set aside. Spread pine nuts over bottom of sheet pan and place pan in oven on top rack. Roast until golden brown, approximately 2 to 4 minutes. Remove from oven and set aside.Peel and devein shrimp. Set aside. Wash and slice fresh mushrooms. Set aside. Boil pasta in large pot of water to al dente stage according to directions on package. Set Aside.Prepare lemon butter sauce: Melt 1 tablespoon butter in large skillet over medium-high heat. Sauté shallots and garlic until translucent. Add white wine and reduce slightly more than 1/2, whisking occasionally. Add cream and reduce by 1/2. Add lemon juice and reduce by 1/2. Add white pepper. Reduce heat to low. Add remaining butter 2 tablespoons at a time, whisking continuously after each addition to completely incorporate butter. Continue to simmer, whisking until sauce just coats spoon.In large skillet over medium-high heat melt the 4 tablespoons of butter. Add garlic and sauté until garlic is translucent. Stir in mushrooms, shrimp, and pine nuts. Sauté several minutes or until shrimp are done and show color. Remove skillet from heat and gently stir in spinach. Place warm pasta on plate with shrimp mixture to the side. Pour lemon sauce over pasta, permitting a bit of sauce onto shrimp.

AN OUTLINE OFTHE ORDINANCE OF SECOND ANOINTINGS

2007-07-18T14:46:00.000-06:00

From the Nauvoo Temple "Book of Anointings"

I. THE ORDINANCE OF THE WASHING OF THE FEET

1. The ordinance of washing of the feet, for the man, precedes the second anointing ordinance.
2. It is normally performed in the Holy of Holies, or a sealing room set apart for such an ordinance.
3. It is performed by, or under the direction of, the Prophet.
4. The ordinance was used once, in the days of the Prophet Joseph, to seal individuals up to eternal life, but it is not used for that purpose today.
5. The ordinance cleanses the brother from the blood and sins of this generation.
6. This ordinance should not be confused with the last ordinance of the second anointing which is also referred to as the washing of feet.

II. THE ORDINANCE OF SECOND ANOINTINGS --
Part OneAnointed & Ordained a King/Priest, Queen/Priestess1. It is normally administered in the Holy of Holies, but can be, and has been, administered in different locations, in a room dedicated for that purpose.
2. It is performed by, or under the direction of, the Prophet.
3. There are normally two witnesses to the event.
4. The individuals who are being anointed are dressed in their temple robes.
5. The officiator does not have to dress in his robes.
6. The husband leads in a prayer circle, and offers the signs, and prays at the altar.
7. The husband is anointed with oil, on the top of his head, and then hands are laid upon his head, and he is ordained a king and a priest unto the Most High God, to rule and reign in the House of Israel forever. This ordinance gives him the fulness of the priesthood.
8. The husband is blessed with the following (as the spirit dictates):
(1) Sealing power to bind & loose, curse & bless.
(2) Blessings of Abraham, Isaac & Jacob.
(3) The Holy Spirit of Promise bestowed.
(4) Blessed to live as long as life is desirable.
(5) Blessed to attain unto the Godhood.
(6) Power to be a member of a Godhead bestowed.
(7) Sealed to eternal life, if not done previously.
(8) Power to have the heavens opened.
(9) Other blessings as inspired to give.
9. The wife is then anointed with oil, on the top of her head, and then hands are laid upon her head, and she is ordained a queen and a priestess unto her husband, to rule and reign with him, in his kingdom forever.
10. The wife is blessed with the following (as the spirit dictates):
(1) Receive all the blessings of the everlasting priesthood.
(2) An heir to all the blessings that are sealed upon her husband.
(3) Exalted to her husband's exaltation.
(4) Ministering angels may attend her.
(5) Sealed up unto eternal life.
(6) Receive the blessings of Godhood.
(7) May attain unto the eternal Godhead.
(8) Live as long as life is desirable.
(9) Power of eternal lives (posterity w/o end).
(10) Other blessings as inspired to give.
11. The couple receives a "charge" as a part of the second anointing. Part of the covenant involved in this charge is that they do not reveal to other individuals that they have received this ordinance.
12. This ordinance can be performed for the dead, by those who have already received the ordinance.
13. The second part of the second anointings is explained to the couple. They are told to attend to this last ordinance.

III. THE ORDINANCE OF SECOND ANOINTINGS --

Part Two"The Washing of The Feet", Wife to Husband
1. This ordinance is performed in the couple's home.
2. The husband dedicates the home, and a room in which they will perform the ordinance.
3. The ordinance follows the pattern of when Mary anointed Jesus, in Matthew 12. What the wife does here is in memorial of what Mary did.
4. The wife washes the body of her husband (similar to initiatory).
5. The wife anoints the body of her husband (similar to initiatory).
6. The ordinance prepares the husband for burial, and in this way she lays claim upon him in the resurrection.
7. Having authority, she can pronounce whatever blessings she feels appropriate upon her husband in this ordinance, as guided by the spirit.
8. This ordinance is not performed in behalf of the dead.

Writing Hack- Makeing a Mont Blanc from a cheap pen

2007-07-16T15:14:00.000-06:00

Instructables Save $200 in 2 minutes and have the worlds best writing pen

Homeland Security at the Truckstop

2007-07-02T09:08:00.000-06:00

Early Sunday morning I rose before my friends camping. We were short on supplies for breakfast so I snuck away to grab groceries and coffee. I came upong the Flying J gas station in Brigham City, Utah and was genuinely surprised to see this sign above the door. Threat Level Today Yellow (Please see cashier for details). This had me wonder . . . . are these gas station cashiers somehow the source for counter terror information? How ignorant do I have to be of the situation in the world to get a security briefing from Norma behind the counter? Is the terror level still relevant? Why is Flying J doing this?

To tackle the relevancy issue I think this weekend was a good example. Nearly all US airports were in a heightened security following the Glasgow and London indicents over the weekend. Travel times delayed. Major cities showed a stronger police and security presence. The NYPD had officers with machine guns standing in Times Square along with lines of patrol cars, as many as 75 in a row, with lights and sirens near tourist spots to have a added show of security.

It's a strange myopic world view perpetuated top down in the politics of this country. I didn't ask but I suspect that Norma behind the counter couldn't speak to the london bombing attempt or the machine guns in Times Square. But she may know that we are still on Yellow Alert because nothing has changed.

Cold sesame noodles

2007-06-08T10:58:00.000-06:00

Here are a couple recipes I've collected and ammended.

America's Test Kitchen

1/4 cup sesame seeds
1/4 cup chunky peanut butter
2 medium cloves garlic, minced or pressed through
garlic press (about 2 teaspoons)
1 piece (1-inch) fresh ginger, grated or minced (about
1 tablespoon)
5 tablespoons soy sauce
2 tablespoons rice vinegar
1 teaspoon hot sauce (they say Tabasco, I use Sriracha, and I use probably about 2 t)
2 tablespoons lightly packed light brown sugar
Hot water

Lightly toast the sesame seeds. Reserve a tablespoonfull and add everything else to a blender or food processor and process, and then drizzle in hot water slowly until it gets to the consistency you like (I've found that this is anywhere from 4 to 6 T). Add the sesame seeds to the sauce afterwards, and toss with the noodles of your choice (I've used everything from udon noodes to regular spaghetti noodles). I love this with thinly sliced cucumber and red bell pepper.

_______________________________________________________________________________

Another that looks good.

For one lb noodles:

1/2 c. peanut oil
1/2 c. tahini
1/4 c. sesame oil
1/4 c. soy sauce
1/4 c. rice wine vinegar
3-4 crushed/minced large garlic cloves
1-2 T. minced fresh ginger
cayenne or red pepper flakes to taste

Whisk dressing ingredients together and toss with warm pasta. Refrigerate. Garnish w/chopped green onions and sesame seeds
* For special parties, I sometimes toss in steamed shrimp, blanched broccoli florets and colored bell pepper strips*

_______________________________________________________________________________

Cold Sesame Noodles1 lb Chinese egg noodles
1/4 cup chopped peanuts
1 bunch chopped scallions
1 cucumber, peeled and sliced
cilantro for garnish (optional)

1/2 cup unsalted peanut butter (preferably natural)
1/2 cup tahini
3 tbsp tamari soy sauce
2 tbsp dark Chinese-style sesame oil
2 tbsp hot chile oil (or substitute with 1/2 tsp cayenne)
2 tbsp rice vinegar
1 inch piece of ginger, grated

Add the noodles to a large pot of boiling water and cook for 3-4 minutes. Drain. Put the peanut butter and tahini in a saucepan and heat slowly until melted. Add soy sauce, oils, vinegar and ginger. Add water in small quantities till you get a smooth paste that is about as viscous as honey. Cool. Pour the sauce over the noodles and mix thoroughly. Add peanuts and mix once again. Garnish with scallions and sliced cucumbers and chill for an hour before serving.

_______________________________________________________________________________
Sesame Sauce
Seasoning Sauce:
1/3-cup sesame paste*
1⁄4-cup oil
3 T soy sauce
3 T vinegar
2 T sugar
3 T hot water
1 T sesame oil
2 cloves garlic
1 T chili oil
3-4 scallions
1 t dried chili peppers, broken up

In the jar of a blender, put the garlic and scallions. Blend until minced. Add remaining ingredients and blend until smooth. Taste and adjust for seasoning. Be aware that the spiciness will increase somewhat.

*Sesame paste is available in Asian grocery stores. It is different from tahini in that the sesame seeds are toasted so that it is darker in color. I get Lan Chi brand.

Toasts

2007-06-05T11:17:00.000-06:00

Here's to the women who buy lots of shoes.They take our money and drink our booze.They may not have their cherry but that's no sinThey still have the box the cherry came in.
***
Here's to being single, seeing double and sleeping triple.
***
May those that love us, love us.And those that don’t love us,May God turn their hearts.And if he doesn’t turn their hearts,May he turn their ankles,So we’ll know them by their limping.
***
Here's to women's kisses,and to whiskey, amber clear;Not as sweet as a woman's kiss,but a darn sight more sincere!
***
Here's to me, and here's to you,And here's to love and laughter-I'll be true as long as you,And not one moment after.
***
May your troubles be less,And your blessing be more.And nothing but happiness,Come through your door.
***
May your house always be too small to hold all your friends.
***
Here's to all of the women who have used me and abused me...And may they continue to do so!"
***
Real pain for my sham friendsChampagne for my real friends!
***

How to Tie the 10 Most Useful Knots

2007-05-07T17:11:00.000-06:00

How to Tie the 10 Most Useful Knots
1: Overhand Knot
2: Figure-eight Know
3: Reef (Square) Knot
4: Sheet (Becket) Bend
5: Carrick Bend
6: Bowline
7: Clove Hitch
8: Timber Hitch
9: Taut-line Hitch
10: Sheepshank

2007-05-07T09:43:00.001-06:00

Fresh Margaritas

The longer you let the zest and juice mixture steep, the more intensely citrusy your margaritas will be. We recommend steeping for the full 24 hours, although the margaritas will still be great if the mixture is steeped for the minimum four hours. If you're in a rush and need to serve the drinks immediately, omit the zest and skip the steeping process altogether. We suggest using reposado ("rested") tequila, which is made from 100 percent blue agave and aged for between two and 12 months. Tasters liked its mellow flavor and thought it blended perfectly with the other ingredients. Makes about 1 quart, serving 4 to 6
4 teaspoons grated lime zest
1/2 cup lime juice from 2 to 3 medium limes
4 teaspoons grated lemon zest
1/2 cup lemon juice from 2 to 3 medium lemons
1/4 cup superfine sugar
Pinch table salt
2 cups crushed ice
1 cup 100 percent agave tequila, preferably reposado
1 cup triple sec 1. Combine lime zest and juice, lemon zest and juice, sugar, and salt in large liquid measuring cup; cover with plastic wrap and refrigerate until flavors meld, 4 to 24 hours. 2. Divide 1 cup crushed ice between 4 to 6 margarita or double old-fashioned glasses. Strain juice mixture into 1-quart pitcher or cocktail shaker. Add tequila, triple sec, and remaining crushed ice; stir or shake until thoroughly combined and chilled, 20 to 60 seconds. Strain into ice-filled glasses; serve immediately.

Cheap and Chic Hotels in Paris - Travel - New York Times

2007-04-24T14:12:00.000-06:00

Cheap and Chic Hotels in Paris - Travel - New York Times

For my still yet-to-be-taken romantic trip to Paris

THE LIST
Hôtel Langlois 63, rue Saint-Lazare; Ninth Arrondissement (33-1-4874-7824; www.hotel-langlois.com).
Hôtel Chopin, 46, passage Jouffroy; Ninth Arrondissement (33-1-4770-5810; www.hotelchopin.fr).
Hôtel Amour, 8, rue Navarin; Ninth Arrondissement (33-1-4878-3180; www.hotelamour.com).
Hôtel Verneuil, 8, rue de Verneuil; Seventh Arrondissement (33-1-4260-8214, www.hotelverneuil.com).
Hôtel Muguet, 11, rue Chevert; (33-1-4705-0593; Seventh Arrondissement www.hotelmuguet.com).
Hôtel Lindbergh, 5, rue Chomel, Seventh Arrondissement (33-1-4548-3553; www.hotellindbergh.com).
Hôtel de Varenne, 44, rue de Bourgogne; Seventh Arrondissement (33-1-4551-4555; www.varenne-hotel-paris.com).
Hôtel Eldorado, 18, rue des Dames; 17th Arrondissement (33-1-4522-3521; www.eldoradohotel.fr).
Hôtel de Nice, 42 bis, rue de Rivoli; Fourth Arrondissement (33-1-4278-5529; www.hoteldenice.com).
Hôtel Windsor Home, 3, rue Vital; 16th Arrondissement (33-1-4504-4949; www.windsorhomeparis.fr).
Hôtel des Grandes Ecoles, 75, rue Cardinal Lemoine; the Fifth Arrondissement (33-1-4326-7923; www.hotel-grandes-ecoles.com).
New Orient Hotel, 16, rue de Constantinople; Eighth Arrondissement (33-1-4522-2164; www.hotel-paris-orient.com).

Boing Boing: DNC appoints RIAA shill to run Public Affairs for convention

2007-04-13T09:28:00.000-06:00

Boing Boing: DNC appoints RIAA shill to run Public Affairs for convention

What dipshit at the DNCC thinks that this is a good idea? All over the Blogosphere I've read people blogging about what a shitty idea this is. The RIAA is the same company that was recently voted, by the readers of consumerist, as the worst company in America.

Advice to a young man

2007-03-16T13:40:00.000-06:00

Advice to Young Men from an Old Man - From The Best of Craigslist SF

1. Don’t pick on the weak. It’s immoral. Don’t antagonize the strong without cause, its stupid.
2. Don’t hate women. It’s a waste of time 3
. Invest in yourself. Material things come to those that have self actualized.
4. Get in a fistfight, even if you are going to lose.
5. As a former Marine, take it from me. Don’t join the military, unless you want to risk getting your balls blown off to secure other people’s economic or political interests.
6. If something has a direct benefit to an individual or a class of people, and a theoretical, abstract, or amorphous benefit to everybody else, realize that the proponent’s intentions are to benefit the former, not the latter, no matter what bullshit they try to feed you.
7. Don’t be a Republican. They are self-dealing crooks with no sense of honor or patriotism to their fellow citizens. If you must be a Republican, don’t be a “conservative.” They are whining, bitching, complaining, simple-minded self-righteous idiots who think they’re perpetual victims. Listen to talk radio for a while, you’ll see what I mean.
8. Don’t take proffered advice without a critical analysis. 90% of all advice is intended to benefit the proponent, not the recipient. Actually, the number is probably closer to 97%, but I don’t want to come off as cynical.
9. You’ll spend your entire life listening to people tell you how much you owe them. You don’t owe the vast majority of people shit.
10. Don’t undermine your fellow young men. Mentor the young men that come after you. Society recognizes that you have the potential to be the most power force in society. It scares them. Society does not find young men sympathetic. They are afraid of you, both individually and collectively. Law enforcement’s primary purpose is to suppress you.
11. As a young man, you’re on your own. Society divides and conquers. Unlike women who have advocates looking out for them (NOW, Women’s Study Departments, government, non-profit organizations, political advocacy groups) almost no one is looking out for you.
12. Young men provide the genius and muscle by which our society thrives. Look at the Silicone Valley. By in large, it was not old men or women that created the revolution we live. Realize that society steals your contributions, secures it with our intellectual property laws, and then takes credit and the rewards where none is due.
13. Know that few people have your best interests at heart. Your mother does. Your father probably does (if he stuck around). Your siblings are on your side. Everybody else worries about themselves.
14. Don’t be afraid to tell people to “Fuck off” when need be. It is an important skill to acquire. As they say, speak your piece, even if your voice shakes.
15. Acquire empathy, good interpersonal skills, and confidence. Learn to read body language and non-verbal communication. Don’t just concentrate on your vocational or technical skills, or you’ll find your wife fucking somebody else.
16. Keep fit.
17. Don’t speak ill of your wife/girlfriend. Back her up against the world, even if she’s wrong. She should know that you have her back. When she needs your help, give it. She should know that you’ll take her part.
18. Don’t cheat on your wife/girlfriend. If you must cheat, don’t humiliate her. Don’t risk having your transgressions come back to her or her friends. Don’t do it where you live. Don’t do it with people in your social circle. Don’t shit in your own back yard.
19. If your girlfriend doesn’t make you feel good about yourself and bring joy to your life, fire her. That’s what girlfriends are for.
20. Don’t bother with “emotional affairs.” They are just a vehicle for women to flirt and have someone make them feel good about themselves. That’s the part of a relationship they want. For you it is a lot of work and investment in time. If they are having an emotional affair with you, they’re probably fucking someone else.
21. Becoming a woman’s friend and confidant is not going to get you into an intimate relationship. If you haven’t gotten the girl within a reasonably short period of time, chances are you won’t ever get her. She’ll end up confiding to you about the sexual adventures she’s having with someone else.
22. Have and nurture friendships with women.
23. Realize that love is a numbers game. Guys fall in love easily. You’re going to see some girl and feel like you’ll die if you don’t get her. If she rejects you, move on to the next one. It’s her loss.
24. Don’t be an internet troll. Got out and live life. There is not a cadre of beautiful women advertising on Craigslist to have NSA sex with you. Beautiful women don’t need to advertise. The websites that advertise with attractive women’s photos and claims of loneliness are baloney. All they want is your money and your personal information so that they can market to you. The posts on Craigslist by young “women” seeking NSA sex, and asking for a picture are just a bunch of gay troll pic collectors. This is especially true if the post uses common gay lexicon like “hole” as in “fuck my hole” or seeks “masculine” men, or uses the word cock (except in the context of “Don’t send a cock shot.”) There are women on Craigslist. They are easily recognizable by their 2-5 paragraph postings. Most are in their 30's or older.
25. When you become a man in full, know that people will get in your way. People who are attracted to you will somehow manage to step in your path. Gay guys will give you “the look.” Old people will somehow stumble in front of you at the worst time. Don’t get frustrated. Just step aside and go about your business. Know that these are passive aggressive methods to get you to acknowledge their existence.
26. Don’t gay bash. Don’t mentally or physically abuse people because of who they are, or how they present themselves. It’s none of your business to try to intimidate people into conformity.
27. If your gay, admit it to yourself, your parents, your friends and society at large. Be prepared to get harassed. See rule 14. If someone threatens you or assaults you, call the cops. Have them arrested. You have no obligation to self sacrifice because of who you are. As a gay person, you’ll have more social freedom than straight men. Use it to protect yourself. Be prepared to get out of Dodge if your orientation makes your life unbearable. Move to San Francisco, New York, Atlanta, or New Orleans. You’ll find a welcoming community there.
28. Don’t be a poser. Avoid being one of those dudes who puts a surfboard on top of their car, but never surfs, or a dude with a powder coated fixed gear bike and a messenger bag, but was never a messenger. Live the life. Earn your bona fides.
29. Don’t believe the crap about the patriarchy. More women are accepted and attend college. More degrees are awarded to women than men. Women outlive men. More men commit suicide. Men are twice as likely to be victims of violence, including murder. If you consider sexual assaults in prisons, twice as many men are raped as women (society thinks prison rape is funny). The streets are littered with homeless men, sprinkled with a few homeless women. Statically, women are happier than men. The myth that girls are being cheated by are educational system is belied by the fact that schools are bastions of femininity, mostly run by and taught by women. Girls outperform boys in school. It is the boys in school getting fucked over, and prescribed ritalin for being boys. Real wages for men are falling, while real wages for women are rising. Just because someone says something enough times, doesn’t make it true. You have nothing to feel guilty about.
30. Remember, 97% of all advice is worthless. Take what you can use, and trash the rest.

Day 1

2007-02-21T10:12:00.000-07:00

I the past I had given up something in an attempt to observe Lent. This year I'm going to take a more active role by doing something productive.

I'll make a daily practice of mindfullness.
This could be by just being present with my thoughts
It also could be an active practice like medatition or Yoga.
I'll suppliment these practices with reading or learning to enhance what I'm doing.

From today til Easter 40 days from now I'll blog my progress.

Ship of Fools: 40 Ideas for Lent

2007-02-21T10:00:00.000-07:00

40 Ideas for Lent

I'm contimplating what to give up for Lent this year I googled it and found a list on the Ship of Fools site. Past years have been beer, sex, etc... Stay tuned for my decision.

Here are their first 10 days ideas.
Day 1 – Wed 21 Feb: Go on a media diet>
Day 2 – Thur 22 Feb: Find Lent readings>
Day 3 – Fri 23 Feb: Recycle, freecycle>
Day 4 – Sat 24 Feb: Upload a poem>
Day 5 – Mon 26 Feb: Walk and watch>
Day 6 – Tues 27 Feb: Your chore is my chore>
Day 7 – Wed 28 Feb: Bake a cake>
Day 8 – Thur 1 Mar: Out your doubts>
Day 9 – Fri 2 Mar: Someone else's preference>
Day 10 – Sat 3 Mar: Send a message

2007-02-12T14:15:00.000-07:00

**Note to self** If you ever publish a book. Have a friend/editor/nonretarded neighbor think about any "naming problems" that may exist.

Warring States Period - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

2007-01-31T09:43:00.000-07:00

The Warring States Period and the Three Kingdoms period of Chinese history have always been favorites of mine. The stories of kings, power, corruption, deception are worthy of a soap opera. In fact I know there was a 80+ part series on the the Romance of the Three Kingdoms novel on Chinese televesion.

I could read a multi-part drama like James Clavell's Shogun. Maybe I'll write it.

Unhappy Meals - Michael Pollan - New York Times

2007-01-29T14:30:00.000-07:00

Unhappy Meals - Michael Pollan - New York Times
January 28, 2007

Eat food. Not too much. Mostly plants.

That, more or less, is the short answer to the supposedly incredibly complicated and confusing question of what we humans should eat in order to be maximally healthy. I hate to give away the game right here at the beginning of a long essay, and I confess that I’m tempted to complicate matters in the interest of keeping things going for a few thousand more words. I’ll try to resist but will go ahead and add a couple more details to flesh out the advice. Like: A little meat won’t kill you, though it’s better approached as a side dish than as a main. And you’re much better off eating whole fresh foods than processed food products. That’s what I mean by the recommendation to eat “food.” Once, food was all you could eat, but today there are lots of other edible foodlike substances in the supermarket. These novel products of food science often come in packages festooned with health claims, which brings me to a related rule of thumb: if you’re concerned about your health, you should probably avoid food products that make health claims. Why? Because a health claim on a food product is a good indication that it’s not really food, and food is what you want to eat.

Pollan knows his shit. Fo shizzle

Free Stock Photos

2007-01-23T10:34:00.000-07:00

Free Stock Photos

This is a list of 73 sites have royalty free stock photos available for both personal and commercial use

How Many Lightbulbs Does it Take to Change the World? One. And You're Looking At It.

2007-01-22T16:45:00.000-07:00

How Many Lightbulbs Does it Take to Change the World? One. And You're Looking At It.

In the September issue of Fast Company Magazine is a fascinating article about the compact fluorescent light bulb. Amazing to think all of the $ we are flushing away by not using these.

Compact fluorescents emit the same light as classic incandescents but use 75% or 80% less electricity

If every one of 110 million American households bought just one ice-cream-cone bulb, took it home, and screwed it in the place of an ordinary 60-watt bulb, the energy saved would be enough to powerall the homes in Delaware and Rhode Island.

In terms of oil not burned, or greenhouse gases not exhausted into the atmosphere, one bulb is equivalent to taking 1.3 million cars off the roads.

The Rubiks Cube Solution

2007-01-22T13:59:00.000-07:00

The Rubiks Cube Solution

The Seven-Step Guide to Solving a Rubiks cube Just in case I ever want to solve one of these damn things.

Grammar Girl's Quick and Dirty Tips for Better Writing

2007-01-22T09:10:00.000-07:00

Grammar Girl's Quick and Dirty Tips for Better Writing

To this day I still have trouble with grammar rules such as affect vs. effect. I know the rule but can't beat it into my skull. I'm going to have to give Grammer Girl's podcast a listen.

A password for your future self

2007-01-05T10:55:00.000-07:00

Azure Monk on Everything

A interesting exercise in temporal theoretics. If I visited myself from the future how would I know it's really me? I create a password for myself that only I know.

Bush quietly authorizes opening of Americans' mail

2007-01-05T10:44:00.000-07:00

NY Daily News 01/04/2007
Bush quietly authorizes opening of Americans' mail

By James Gordon Meek -New York Daily News

WASHINGTON - President Bush has quietly claimed sweeping new powers to open Americans' mail without a judge's warrant, the New York Daily News has learned. The president asserted his new authority when he signed a postal reform bill into law on Dec. 20. Bush then issued a "signing statement" that declared his right to open people's mail under emergency conditions.
That claim is contrary to existing law and contradicted the bill he had just signed, say experts who have reviewed it. Bush's move came during the winter congressional recess and a year after his secret domestic electronic eavesdropping program was first revealed. It caught Capitol Hill by surprise.

WTF, Is the executive branch completely fucking nuts run amuk. I can't imagine how this one is going to make it without crazy controversy. This makes warrentless wiretapping look small.

2007-01-02T22:46:00.000-07:00

Damon Linker writes in the present issue of The New Republic concerning the Romney/Prophet dilemma. It's something I discussed on my blog back in July regarding Romney as the Prophet's puppet.

Can a man who believes that there is a old guy in Salt Lake City that literally can speak with god think independently enough to govern without any influence? Linker explains it in his article like this....

Does Romney believe that the president of the Mormon Church is a genuine prophet of God? If so, how would he respond to a command from this prophet on matters of public policy? And, if his faith would require him to follow this hypothetical command, would it not be accurate to say that, under a President Romney, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints would truly be in charge of the country—with its leadership having final say on matters of right and wrong?

Members of the LDS church sustain Gordon B. Hinkley as Prophet, Seer, and Revelator. In fact the LDS church still has the original "seer stone" that Joseph Smith used to translate the Book of Mormon. Hinkley could begin translating new scriptures. Maybe it would be the mysterious "sealed" portion of the Book of Mormon. Faithful Mormons around the world would accept this revelations as the direct words of God to his prophet.

BTW, this is one a example of a Seer stone owned by by Joseph Smith

Jay's Journal

2007-01-02T16:39:00.000-07:00

For those who don't know it's a "purportedly" autobiographical account written by a boy named Jay. It chronicles Jay’s troubles in a series of diary entries that tell the first person narrative of the story. He starts out as a good LDS boy who falls into a life of alcohol, drugs, sex, and finally satanic worship. Obviously meant as a cautionary tale for LDS youth. I haven't read it for a good 20 years but I seem to recall he and his friends calling themselves the 3 Nephites and parts about moving things with their minds after they had their Satanic Powers!

For those who didn't follow the whole story it came out that Jay’s family was angry because the author embellished LOTS missing parts to make it more compelling.

It's funny how a little bit of critical thinking and hindsite makes something like this silly. But my little teenage mind sucked it all in.

SL Weekly article
Jay's Journal on wikipedia

Freedom In Peril!

2006-12-27T11:22:00.000-07:00

Circulating on the net is a NRA graphic novel titled Freedom in Peril. At first I assumed it was a fake piece to make the NRA look stupid. I was wrong. They're doing it all to themself. Here's some images.

A flattering picture of George Soros!

Hairy legged women with gas!

The First Rule of NHL fight club . . .

2006-12-27T09:22:00.000-07:00

Violence in pro hockey and the code of honor that regulates it.

Unknown to many a neophyte hockey fan(like myself). There is a unwritten code of conduct about who fights and when. It involves escalation of of the unwritten rules and then an elaborate dance of who fights who and when. Most interesting to me is the underlying benefit that teams with a good enforcer will gain extra room on the ice for their smaller finesse players.

More on Romney as president

2006-12-21T14:11:00.000-07:00

Romney's Religion A Mormon president? No way. By Jacob Weisberg

Jacob Weisberg wrote quite a informative and inflammatory piece regarding how Romney's strange religious beliefs should bring serious questions to his judgement.

Others, myself included, would not, under most imaginable circumstances, vote for a fanatic or fundamentalist—a Hassidic Jew who regards Rabbi Menachem Schneerson as the Messiah, a Christian literalist who thinks that the Earth is less than 7,000 years old, or a Scientologist who thinks it is haunted by the souls of space aliens sent by the evil lord Xenu. Such views are disqualifying because they're dogmatic, irrational, and absurd. By holding them, someone indicates a basic failure to think for himself or see the world as it is. By the same token, I wouldn't vote for someone who truly believed in the founding whoppers of Mormonism.

That's pretty strong rhetoric but I suspect that it's the beginning of what we can expect to see. Since I no longer believe in the founding tenets of Mormonism I can easily see Weisberg's point. I consider them about as easy to swallow as Scientology. However the tone of this seems to walk right close to the line of respecting someones religious beliefs that has always been a hallmark of American tolerance. Let's hope it says civil.

Simon Weisenthal's is still a Mormon.

2006-12-19T13:44:00.000-07:00

Mormons remove Wiesenthal from baptism database

LA Times- The church complies with a request that the Nazi hunter's name be erased from a genealogy database for posthumous baptisms.
By K. Connie Kang, Times Staff WriterDecember 19, 2006
A potential conflict between Jewish organizations and the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints over vicarious baptism was averted Monday when the church said that Simon Wiesenthal's name was removed from the church's genealogical records.The Simon Wiesenthal Center in Los Angeles had demanded earlier in the day that Wiesenthal's name be removed from the church's online International Genealogical Index, the church's database of posthumous "ordinances" or vicarious baptisms.

While the LDS church may have removed his name from the databases they still did his "temple work." That means they have baptised him, ordained him to the priesthood, and likely performed a marriage and endowment. The records have changed but until they cancel the ordinances they still consider them valid.

43 folders

2006-12-06T10:22:00.000-07:00

43 folders is something I've seen mentioned around the net on sites like Lifehack. It's based on the book getting things done.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Getting_things_done

Now there is a gmail extension based on this productivity idea.

http://www.gtdgmail.com/

I guess I need to read the book to find out more.

18 Tricks to Teach Your Bodyhttp://health.msn.com/menshealth/articlepage.aspx?cp-documentid=100119940

2006-12-01T10:38:00.000-07:00

http://health.msn.com/menshealth/articlepage.aspx?cp-documentid=100119940

Clear your stuffed nose!
Forget Sudafed. An easier, quicker, and cheaper way to relieve sinus pressure is by alternately thrusting your tongue against the roof of your mouth, then pressing between your eyebrows with one finger. This causes the vomer bone, which runs through the nasal passages to the mouth, to rock back and forth, says Lisa DeStefano, D.O., an assistant professor at the Michigan State University college of osteopathic medicine. The motion loosens congestion; after 20 seconds, you'll feel your sinuses start to drain.

Fight fire without water!
Worried those wings will repeat on you tonight? "Sleep on your left side," says Anthony A. Star-poli, M.D., a New York City gastroenterologist and assistant professor of medicine at New York Medical College. Studies have shown that patients who sleep on their left sides are less likely to suffer from acid reflux. The esophagus and stomach connect at an angle. When you sleep on your right, the stomach is higher than the esophagus, allowing food and stomach acid to slide up your throat. When you're on your left, the stomach is lower than the esophagus, so gravity's in your favor.

Le Beaujolais Nouveau 2006 est arrivé !

2006-11-22T10:40:00.000-07:00

Beaujolais Nouveau is a fresh red wine made from the first pressing of gamay grapes. Beaujolais Nouveau owes its easy drinkability to a winemaking process called carbonic maceration—also called whole berry fermentation. This technique preserves the fresh, fruity quality of the wine, without extracting bitter tannins from the grape skins. By French law it is only released on the third Thursday of November.

It's a fun festive wine that goes great for Thanksgiving. Give it a try.

Wired 14.10: The Information Factories

2006-11-01T11:00:00.001-07:00

Wired 14.10: The Information Factories

What a fascinating concept. The quote from Eric Schmidt in the article says it best "The network is the computer.". We will have a future were a large majority of our lives will have a virtual component to them. Consider the value of all of our intangible assets that we will have, but never acctually posess.

Just like the early vision contained in Second Life, each member of this planet will have a digital persona. Obviously some more than others. Hmm interesting food for thought.

2006-10-30T16:11:00.001-07:00

I would hit that like a vending machine with a stuck bag of chips!

I would hit that so hard the next person to pull me out would be crowned the king of england

I'd hit it like a retard with a new drum set

I'd hit it like the asteroid that started the ice age.

I'd hit it like Whitney on a crack pipe.

I'd hit it like Ike Turner.

I'd hit it like a gay son at BYU.

I'd hit it like a pogo stick.

I'd hit it like Danny Bonaduce on a date with a hooker.

I'd hit it like the Enola Gay.

I'd hit it like the milk bottles in a carnival game.

I'd hit it like Ken Jennings Jeopardy button.

On the GetReligion blog concerning Mitt Romney's Presidential coverage.

2006-10-23T11:26:00.000-06:00

GetReligion: October 23, 2006:

I think the journalist coverage of Romney’s Mormonism is specific to the modern issues regarding it. The miracles believed by mainstream Christians are 2000 years old. The belief in modern Prophets, gold plates written in Egyptian, visits by God & Jesus to a boy in America are all very modern.
For example, the LDS church granted the privilege of priesthood to those of African background by revelation in 1976. Modern religious miracles like revelations from God are strange to mainstream Americans. It’s the modern context that makes this relevant from a journalistic standpoint.
In my personal opinion Romney is the most capable politician we’ve had take a look at the presidency in quite a while. Even as a former Mormon I admire him. But a lingering questions remains . . .
Would a Mormon President do what the Prophet told him to do?

Jacobprimo

Amazing what a little makeup (and some photoshop) will do!

2006-10-20T17:03:00.000-06:00

See something like this makes you think hard about the images in the media.

Keith Olbermann has big brass balls

2006-10-10T15:42:00.000-06:00

Keith Olbermann goes on the attack - TV NEWS AND INFORMATION - MSNBC.com
I admire Keith Olbermann as the only journalist who consistantly calls the dumbass politicians on their crap. Here is a favorite of mine:

"The president of the United States — unbowed, undeterred and unconnected to reality — has continued his extraordinary trek through our country rooting out the enemies of freedom: the Democrats."

GeoQuiz Games - Test Your Geography Knowledge

2006-10-10T10:43:00.000-06:00

GeoQuiz Games - Test Your Geography Knowledge

What a interesting way to improve your geography. For some reason I get the great lake states mixed up. My best was 100% in 34.4 seconds on the US city quiz.

A note to my son's teacher.

2006-10-06T21:17:00.000-06:00

My 8 yr old son related to me a discussion he had regarding Johnny Appleseed with his teacher. He commented, on something he heard from me, that the apples planted from seed by Johnny Appleseed were actually inedible and planting 30 apples 29 would not be good enough to eat. Well she challenged him and said his father was wrong and she would be happy to call me and educate me. I sat down and typed this response to here after so she wouldn't have to "educate me".

Dear Teacher . . . .(back story above)

This is a simple case of genetics and basic botany. The fruit of apple trees are created by a natural form of hybrid breeding. Apples are cross-pollinators, meaning they require pollen from another apple (of a different variety) in order to produce fruit. Therefore, the seeds produced inside the fruit will receive half of their genes from an outside pollen source. For example if you plant a red delicious apple half the genes will come from that apple and half from the male pollinizer.
The odds of getting a apple from seed sweet enough to bite is approximately 1 in 30, one in a thousand seedlings would be good apple, and one in a million that is worthy for a new variety.

To get edible apples, you graft trees, producing a clone of a tree that you know bears good fruit. And so the fact that Johnny Appleseed was planting apples from seed, which he insisted on because he thought grafting was wicked, meant they were not edible apples, the apples were for cider because you can use any kind of apple for making cider.

Frontier Americans used apples, overwhelmingly, to make hard cider or even stronger applejack. Hard cider was far and away the staple beverage of the nineteenth century frontier, arguably more popular than water. Historians have called Johnny Appleseed the "American Dionysus" because in planting trees only suitable for cider he was bringing the gift of alcohol.

I hope that clears up the confusion.

Respectfully,

Jacob Primo

Sources:

http://umanitoba.ca/afs/hort_inquiries/fruit_and_fruit_plants/johnny_appleseed.html

www.hort.purdue.edu/ext/pollination.html

http://www.pollinator.com/appleseeds_faq.htm

Michael Pollan, The Botany of Desire (2001)-"This book provides a easy summary of the problem and the story"

Robert Price, Johnny Appleseed: Man and Myth
"considered the definitive biography"

Johnny Appleseed: A Voice in the Wilderness, edited by William E. Jones (2000). "A collection of contemporary accounts"

Romney get confronted in South carolina over Mormonism

2006-09-28T10:08:00.000-06:00

The quarterly meeting of the S.C. Republican executive committee Sept. 16 ended on a sour note when one of its more prominent members cornered Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney and grilled him about his Mormon faith.

It was not a pretty sight, according to witnesses.

Romney, a possible Republican candidate for president in 2008, was in town to address the state executive committee.

Cyndi Mosteller, chairwoman of the Charleston County Republican Party, one of the largest GOP organizations in the state, came armed with a bunch of material — and questions — about the Mormon church.

The incident only underlines what could become an uncomfortable debate over Romney’s faith if he runs for the White House. The issue will be on the table in South Carolina’s early primary contest, where roughly 35 percent of GOP voters are evangelical Christians, many of whom view Mormonism with skepticism.

Mosteller, an evangelical, said she especially was concerned about the church’s attitude toward African-Americans and its stand on polygamy.

Ian's show lace site

2006-09-14T11:46:00.000-06:00

Ian's Shoe Lace site

Hmm interesting stuff

Top Ten Signs You're a Fundamentalist Christian

2006-08-01T09:21:00.000-06:00

stolen from evilbible.com:

Top Ten Signs You're a Fundamentalist Christian

10 - You vigorously deny the existence of thousands of gods claimed by other religions, but feel outraged when someone denies the existence of yours.

9 - You feel insulted and "dehumanized" when scientists say that people evolved from other life forms, but you have no problem with the Biblical claim that we were created from dirt.

8 - You laugh at polytheists, but you have no problem believing in a Triune God.

7 - Your face turns purple when you hear of the "atrocities" attributed to Allah, but you don't even flinch when hearing about how God/Jehovah slaughtered all the babies of Egypt in "Exodus" and ordered the elimination of entire ethnic groups in "Joshua" including women, children, and trees!

6 - You laugh at Hindu beliefs that deify humans, and Greek claims about gods sleeping with women, but you have no problem believing that the Holy Spirit impregnated Mary, who then gave birth to a man-god who got killed, came back to life and then ascended into the sky.

5 - You are willing to spend your life looking for little loopholes in the scientifically established age of Earth (few billion years), but you find nothing wrong with believing dates recorded by Bronze Age tribesmen sitting in their tents and guessing that Earth is a few generations old.

4 - You believe that the entire population of this planet with the exception of those who share your beliefs -- though excluding those in all rival sects - will spend Eternity in an infinite Hell of Suffering. And yet consider your religion the most "tolerant" and "loving."

3 - While modern science, history, geology, biology, and physics have failed to convince you otherwise, some idiot rolling around on the floor speaking in "tongues" may be all the evidence you need to "prove" Christianity.

2 - You define 0.01% as a "high success rate" when it comes to answered prayers. You consider that to be evidence that prayer works. And you think that the remaining 99.99% FAILURE was simply the will of God.

1 - You actually know a lot less than many atheists and agnostics do about the Bible, Christianity, and church history - but still call yourself a Christian

Mitt Romney as a puppet for the LDS Prophet.

2006-07-25T11:00:00.000-06:00

The speculation regarding Romney and the electability of a Mormon has been going on for a while now. One issue that I've failed to see addressed is the risk of a President with strong LDS beliefs as just a puppet for the church.

As a believing latter-day saint Romney believes that Hinckley is the authorized conduit of god. He is a prophet just like moses. In his eyes Gordon B Hinckley is the mouthpiece of god. As a good believing saint he wouldn't question the revelation of the prophet or his specific advice. The prophet could tell him to do something and he would. Period!

As a believing Latter Day Saint we make specific promises to put the church about all. We make these "covenants" in the temple. Members in the temple covenant to keep the Law of Sacrifice. In doing so, participants "covenant to sacrifice all that we possess, even our own lives if necessary, in sustaining and defending the kingdom of God." The "kingdom of god" is the LDS church.

Take this a step further. It's not unlikely that Boyd K Packer could ascend to "prophet" in the next few years. Just imagine the power that a religious nut like Packer would try to exercise over a LDS president.

Holy crap that's scarier than a temple throat slash!

Using the Queen's Engerlish

2006-05-23T11:05:00.000-06:00

So, here are some rules to keep in mind when using the Queen's Engerlish:

- Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.

- And don't start a sentence with a conjunction.

- Avoid cliches like the plague. (They're old hat).

- Always avoid annoying alliteration.

- Be more or less specific.

- Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are (usually) unnecessary.

- Also, too, never, ever use repetitive redundancies.

- No sentence fragments. No comma splices, run-ons are bad too.

- Contractions aren't helpful and shouldn't be used.

- Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.

- Do not be redundant; do not use more words than necessary; it's highly superfluous.

- One should never generalize.

- Don't use no double negatives.

- Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.

- One-word sentences? Eliminate.

- Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.

- Never use a big word when a diminutive one would suffice.

- Use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.

- Use the apostrophe in it's proper place and omit it when its not needed.

- If you've heard it once, you've heard it a thousand times: resist
hyperbole; not one writer in a million can use it correctly.

- Puns are for children, not groan readers.

- Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.

- Who needs rhetorical questions?

- Exaggeration is a million times worse than understatement.

- Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.

From the book "Fumblerules" by William Safire

Smithy Code

2006-04-27T15:03:00.000-06:00

In his ruling for Davinci code plagerism trail, Judge Peter Smith had hidden his own code in the text of the ruling.
The Italic/Bold letters are. We should assume that Smithycode is either the intro or the cipher key. The judge hinted that it can be solved the same way a message was deciphered in the book.

smithycodeJaeiextostgpsacgreamqwfkadpmqzviMi

What the Book of Revelations the last written?

2006-04-20T10:57:00.000-06:00

Using external evidence and some early tradition most scholars will use the date of 95-96 CE for Revelation. Irenaeus gives us the most credible reason for this dating.
[*]He was Bishop of Lyon in Gaul. And lived very close to the apostolic era
[*]He was student of Polycarp who was one of the disciples of John the Evangelist. Polycarp himself was converted by the apostles, made bishop of Smyrna, and knew many people who had seen Jesus.
[*]Irenaeus had ample opportunity to obtain the correct information and he seems to state it quite positively when it was written.
In Against Heresies Irenaeus wrote:

We will not, however, incur the risk of pronouncing positively as to the name of Antichrist; for if it were necessary that his name should be distinctly revealed in this present time, it would have been announced by him who beheld the apocalyptic vision. For that was seen no very long time since, but almost in our day, towards the end of Domitian's reign(A.H. 5.30.3)

Emperor Domitian reigned 81-96 CE and early church historian Eusebius confirms the statement of Irenaeus in his writings (Church history chapter 18, Book 3).

The next question is when do you date the other books of the New Testament?
[*]It's common agreement that Paul's letters are the earliest. The rest depends on how you critically look at the New Testament.
[*]Modern critical scholars generally place the four gospels in order from Mark, Matthew, Luke and John. Mark being no earlier than 65 CE, Matthew between 70-90 CE, Luke between 80-100 CE, and John in 95-100CE.
[*]There is ample evidence that source documents for the New Testament like Q and The Signs Gospel. Those documents would obviously date much earlier.
[*]Excluding the Signs Gospel within John, I would place the Gospel of John very close to or right after the dating of Revelation. This is due to internal evidence withing the gospel like the theme of Christian expulsion from the synagogue.

The pseudepigraphical epistles of the New Testament all seem to date after the destruction of the temple in 70 CE and possibly as late as 140-150 CE for Second Peter.

It's easy to expect that a half dozen or more books post-date the book of Revelation aka The Apocalypse of John.

No Loot No booze no fun

2006-03-18T18:56:00.001-07:00

I came across the alcohol infused celtic punk band from Chicago The Tossers. Sounds like great drinking music for those who enjoyed classic celtic music like the pogues. I have the album and it's all great.

I gotta fever and the only prescription is more cowbell !

2006-03-06T14:53:00.000-07:00

If you don't know the classic SNL skit of Blue Oyster Cult you're missing out. Finally someone made the cowbell soundboard. The best is playing Don't Fear the Reaper and playing the cowbell yourself.

Putfile - Christopher Walken Cowbell Soundboard

I'm a spirit warrior!

2006-02-23T00:36:00.000-07:00

Trading Spouses Margaret freaking out - Google Video
Trading Spouses Margaret freaking out - Google Video

One of my favorite tv moments in the past few years was the Trading Spouses episode with the wacky christian woman going on a rant about the "new age" people she had to live with. They're "darkslided"